Sideways

Cover up and hide, Howard,
don't let a strong wind carry
away those new curly hair
transplants from a
20 year old donor.

While Bethie was sitting home waiting for a pregnant cat to finally have her kittens so Beth can be photographed with them and fulfill her #purpose of snatching cats and throwing them into a cell in her Hamptons Hellhole, referred to by the neighbors as Stalag Beth, real people are doing real things with their lives instead of sitting around home bound waiting for their botox swelling to subside and their little patchy hair transplants to take root for fear of going outside and having them gone with the wind.

A photo was posted on Beth's Instagram 3/13/15 again naming her new partner, a new phony baloney moron with a made up org name, you know, the one that found another YODA for Beth only to have it die off, some bogus name of "puppykittynycty" as Beth has to be in league with another minion to come up with more kittens to make her famous. She is not getting stuck with any grown cats, as Beth also stated on her Instagram site that the mom to these newborn kittens will be placed in a "sanctuary" [her words, not mine], aka out the back door of NSAL to heaven's gate.

3/13/15, Beth's new photo shoot batch of props, with mom headed to Sanctuary.

ThereisnosanctuaryThereisnosanctuaryThereisnosanctuary

New York, 3/13/15

Heidi Klum launched her lingerie line in NY on Friday, sans Bethie, since I don't think they come in size giant useless moron, so Heidi has no need for a giant over-the-hill plus size model to work the premiere event. Heidi already launched the brand in Australia [kicking out former model Elle MacPherson when the company regrouped and launched Heidi's line of lingerie].

Miami, 3/13/15

Elle showed up in Florida stuck doing some stupid event taken from that movie with Lisa Kudrow [Marci X] with the Power of the Purse event to benefit the Women's Fund which sounds made up, but it's Miami, so whatever. Wonder why Bethie didn't show up with one of her awesome designer knock-offs pretending she is rich and famous.

Fatheaded wife of Stern who is
famous for nothing posted this
photo on Instragram 3/13/15.

Oh, Bethie is jelly of Heidi, so daddy Howard forked over some dough to get Beth in the NY Daily News both in print and online [of course] with her giant stretch pants and we wonder how much it cost Stern to get his wife's photo as the biggest one on the page, oh, maybe $5,000? A one-time small ad can cost $500, but hey, this is big Beth, with a huge photo. Every time the dolt can run out of the house to show up to some D List event, this time it was posing with a bus from the North Shore Animal League (NSAL), it gives Howard an excuse to get her face in print; but it doesn't come for free.

The NY Daily News posted both photos, one cropped for the print edition since Beth is a famous bus model. Oh, Miss Famous posing randomly with a homeless animal. My gosh, this is guaranteed employment for Beth as the world never seems to run out of homeless animals.

How come all this money Howard spends to make Beth famous doesn't go straight to the Beth Fund at NSAL? Well Howard is the Beth Fund, he funds her little existence while Bethie spouts nonsense she is an animal lover when animals are captured victims of her fame quest as she grabs public donations to fund her salary at NSAL while paying her Hamptons House slaves to shut their traps and not sell any stories to the tabs or risk getting their little bags packed for a one way trip to Atlantis.

Kathy Griffin quit Fashion Police before the E Channel could fire her ass for not being funny. Everyone thinks Miss Cancer Drama who is terrified of food because she thinks it will spoil her corpse, will finally get to take over with Missy and Khloe filling in the other spots. We have to wait and watch what happens since we all have to stop insulting celebrities as they need to have their asses kissed all the time as they start believing their own paid employees and paid press items only to have some random comedian bash them on TV sending them into a tailspin, stuffing their faces with mountains of pasta and shrimp with their vodka.

Mrs. Jerry Seinfeld

Oh, and according to CrazyDaysandNights.net, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld had/has [as of May 2014] a fun past time of cheating on his bizarre wife. So who with? 

Tawny Kitaen, that busted up has-been from the 1980's and also with Gwyneth Paltrow, well hey why not? She moved into the Hamptons about 2 years ago, husband takes off, what should a girl do? Sit around? We know the desperately dumped has-been needs publicity and she even consented to an appearance on the Stern radio show last year hoping some aged fans of Stern will think she's hot, since Stern's fan base is 60+ yrs old.

So who had the affair? Jessica or Jerry? Or are they into threesomes? My gosh, that wife is scary; her ex-husband's super rich family [the Nederlanders] claimed she was a golddigger so she should be friends with Bethie but somehow they never connected, what with Beth insanely jealous of any woman with human babies since Beth is a barren pariah that managed to become famous for nothing.

Can Madonna Save Sirius as Stern Thanks Leon Black

3-11-15, Howard Stern kissing Madonna's ass hoping
she can save his show from the Sirius chopping block.

Howard and Beth were all excited for their big publicity day on Wednesday as the two aged nerds hopped around their corporate apartment in Manhattan finally able to get their names in print all because of old lady Madonna, whose career has sunk into the bargain basement of mothballed recording artists, yet she found more room at the bottom into the pit of nowhere called the Howard Stern satellite radio show.

Beth got zero sleep as usual hopping around with her puffy face and chalky makeup and greasy wig as she had to stay vertical all night to be camera ready for her big appearance on the streets of NY for her "Fox & Friends" TV show appearance on 3-11-2015, which was the same day as Howard interviewed Madonna on his Sirius satellite radio show. Beth was posing in front of a bus for homeless animals from the charity that pays her a salary, the North Shore Animal League (NSAL). 

On Wednesday's show, 3-11-15, we heard how great Howard Stern is and that he saved satellite radio from oblivion. Howard rehashed that story bragging about how Leon Black brought Stern to Sirius when we all thought it was only Martine Rothblatt. Good to know. 

So, are we all friends now? Clear Channel has shows on Sirius? Really?

Howard always starts to brag about how he made Sirius satellite famous when execs threaten to unplug his wig. Howard cries in his pasta and shrimp every night because he knows without a radio show, he would simply disappear. And, it's pretty hilarious that everyone knows that the satellite company XM turned down Stern's demands for a ton of money to come to their company. It was Siriusly, take it or leave it since Stern was being forced off free radio, but who signed Stern with Sirius? 

Martine [pictured in December 2014] was the woman
responsible for bringing Stern to satellite and
quickly ditched the company because it was losing
money. Stern admits Leon Black was also involved.

It was Martine Rothblatt, the man in the dress, along with Leon Black who Howard named his purebred Maine Coon cat after called Leon Bear, that were the ones bringing Howard Stern to Sirius.

Leon Bear was the cat Beth snatched during Hurricane Katrina when NSAL drove around with a truck and stole a bunch of purebred animals to sell as "abandoned", and Beth got first choice from the shipment as she sat on her ass doing nothing but checking to see which cat would be photogenic for her little Hamptons studio.

Howard was really getting in all his plugs when talking about Beth on Fox & Friends, as if the dolt has a career when she was just pushing a bus filled with homeless dogs.

Miss Monster Thighs wearing the
stretch pants on morning television
posing in front of the NSAL bus for
publicity on 3/11/15

Howard thinks satellite radio is so important what with the corporate subscribers and new cars sitting empty yet and he said they have 27 million subscribers. Oh, that's roughly half the population of California, a drop in the bucket compared to Clear Channels 238 million monthly listeners. Subscribers are not ratings, and no one knows who is listening to what show unless a poll and survey is conducted which is an unreliable gauge of reality.

What's the frequency, Howard?
Embarrassingly stupid photo of Howard
Stern from an online article praising
the Stern satellite radio show. 

So what is the gauge for Howard's reality? His paid stooge Marianne Garvey calling into Howard's stale show because Howard pays her to call in for some plugola...hey, Howard had listeners on Wednesday with Madonna crowding in on the Stern couch, a big first for Stern as he poses for publicity photos of his weaved mop dyed black he glues to his head.

#dawgshed #leonblack #martinerothblatt #leon #black #bear #cats #sirius #howardstern #bethostern #martine #mariannegarvey #foxandfriends

Singular Liar?

Three fugnuts pose together
as Jenny has a show on Sirius satellite
 and had as guests the creepy serial killer-looking
brother and sister tag team Julianne Hough who
couldn't extort dough out of Ryan Seacrest and
her brother who she procures women for holding
interviews at a local gym according to
Crazy Days and Nights. It looks like Jenny
hired the same wig man as Beth.

In case anyone cares, the "sternist.com" is back online and posting the full Howard Stern satellite daily shows for free of charge on the Internet. So we all get to hear Howard's tall tales about when he thinks he was single, as he talked about on Tuesday's satellite radio show, that he was not sure he was single at one point, or at all.

Too bad since Howard stated he had a chance at two prize sluts [my word, not his]. If you just look at them you had better have a prescription for a ton of penicillin or at least a note from your mommy that it's okay to have first time sex with a couple of pros, Jenny McCarthy, Miss ADD Mentally Deficient and Miss Tranny Jillian Barnaby who has admitted she is on a million doctor prescribed psycho drugs because she's nuts aside from being ugly [oh right, she said she was molested, sorry toots, but I see your husband finally cut and ran once your reality show was toast].

How's that NutriSystem diet of lipo
and photoshop working for you Jilly?

But both girls would love to have had a shot at Stern dough, and why not? Oh wow, Howard was really in demand, but when was all this? Oh the girls didn't care if Stern was single or not [just like the girl who won, Beth O'Nobody who was willing to sign her life away to get her mug on television sans a DUI arrest], but Howard wasn't sure he was single when the two sluts were available; well he wasn't. 

Miss Bethie O'Pariah was moved into an apartment a few blocks from Howard's Manhattan penthouse apartment when he purchased his place in 1998 and started with the routine of living in NY during the week and visiting his basement hideout on Long Island on weekends until wife #1 told him to not bother coming home on weekends just to race through the front door and run to the basement and double bolt the door with his little fishies and foot fetishes and toys and having his companion Ralphie in the basement for a game called "working on the radio show". 

Well, Howard's TITANIC is sinking, fast. It is now used as corporate HQ for Howard and Beth. Beth uses it to house a bunch of cats she fosters in her closet, and when she horns in on TV shows in the city, she dresses in the apartment and hires staff to spackle her face and let out the seams in all her recycled dresses. She also uses it to photograph a bunch of cats before dumping them back into the North Shore Animal League's black hole of oblivion or onto some regular foster families in New Jersey who already have a bunch of Beth's so-called foster cats.

So, Howard could have a party with his unknown pudgy fuggy Bethie who apparently believed she was a model at some point, when all that was ever found were her plus size modeling photos. When was Howard single? How about never. Too bad Miss Nobody could never get a job or get on any TV shows before press releasing that she was living with Howard Stern.

Robin wore this same wig and table
cloth with black pants on TCM
except trading the black shoes
for neutral bone-color pumps. This photo
was taken on May 1, 2014 when Robin
attended the J. Martell Foundation's Women
of Influence event in NY.

In case anyone missed it [like the entire world], Robin Quivers was the guest programmer on Turner Classic Movies (TCM) on Tuesday night, with the long time host Robert Osborne having to pretend he knew who she was and that the Stern show is somewhere within his universe and within his circle of people with actual intelligence and not into toilet humor. 

Robin was her usual self, as she loves the camera and was pontificating about classic movies with a memorized script that was over-produced and overblown and when asked real questions about her past career, she stammered. Robert Osborne tried to make something out of nothing with boring Robin as he wondered how he got stuck with a Stern show stooge. Robin also seemed to dance around her real age, saying something like she was five years old in 1961 when she saw "A Raisin In The Sun" [or was it that first Elvis movie she talked about?], oh well, whatever, fine.

Pretty hilarious Robin selecting "classic" films when everyone knows she loves the black vampire movies with Wesley Snipes. Funny those movies were not on her list for TCM, but then Robin is desperate to be on television and unless I missed it, I found it odd she didn't have a sob story about recovering from her staged cancer being stuck at home with TCM getting her through those long lonely hours of chemo, recovery, and mountains of Chinese food with bagels and french fries. Oh well, gotta check out those vampire movies, aside from Robin's favorite, "The Last Action Hero" [featuring a bunch of Heidi Fleiss girls along with Angie Everhart] starring Arnold the former CA Governor, oh no, suddenly Miss Stupido had to appear like she has a brain underneath that crooked wig.

Speaking of stupid, supposedly Bethie will once again pester "Fox & Friends" Wednesday so Howard can get her little makeup and wigs paid for as a business expense while she spends the day in the big city making Madonna jealous that she married Howard Stern when Madonna missed out on his faux single period between wives.

Beth was on Fox & Friends a few months ago pushing that phony book about her bought and paid for purebred Persian cat Yoda. Beth is showing off those awesome ham legs along with her Barbie wig; so when is Beth's next appointment with the men in the white coats?

Happy Madonna Day as we see the clash of the midget and the mothballed monster as Howard stayed up all night panicking and flustered talking with his "mommy" to calm his nerves as he scrambles to print out Madonna's Wikipedia bio for his awesome satellite radio show that Howard can't give away as millions ignore its free access on the Internet.

Old Lady Madonna

For all you active seniors out there, look to your hero, old man Howard Stern, who refused to retire from his moronic phony phone calls and red carpet insults of the stars and kept hammering away at his day job on free radio only to be mothballed with his flabby ass fired. What did he do? Go away and cry in his doctor-ordered medically important meal rations? Nope, he glommed onto the secret society of cross dressing married men and landed squarely on a satellite, now taken over by Monster Malone, a rich buttinsky making dough off of a bunch of satellite radio channels, a pariah in the UK that wants nothing to do with his company that is housed in corporate America where advertising dollars and product sponsors keep satellite afloat.

Yes, Madonna fell flat on her ass and
landed right onto the Howard Stern
radio show. Madonna's agent knew when
it's over, it's over, so go all the
way down, honey, the Stern show means
your career has tanked.

How fitting old lady Madonna has hit a satellite in full force and will be interviewed by King of the Moths hiding in closets making holes in worn out corporate suits, Howard Stern. Wow, how riveting. According to Howard Stern himself on Monday's satellite radio show, he is managing to hobble into the studio on a Wednesday afternoon to tape the interview with Madonna, who is now approaching the grand ol' age of 60 after falling on her lipo ass live on television and splattered across every media outlet when Miss Madonna could not untie her cape fast enough before her dancers grabbed at it and sent her flying. Oh, well, where did she end up? Oh, on the Stern show, how pathetic, but that is the point of satellite radio, it is a bunch of moths circling a flame before being stomped out into oblivion.

Madonna falls on stage at the 2015 Brit Awards.

After Madonna's fall at the Brit Awards, she is not risking any future falls by wearing enormous gravity boots to ensure her feet stick to the Earth and she doesn't topple over on those little osteoporosis short legs of hers while balancing that jug head with the glued on wigs.

Also on Monday's radio show, we heard the food report from Mr. Senior Diet Rations and he was envious of all the real food the two beautiful co-judges [Heidi & Mel B] on "America's Got Talent" (AGT) were feasting on during the taping of the reality show, but nope, Howard had his own special diet for aged closeted men wearing wigged weaves hiding from the public as he has to take out those fake teeth to wash them after each meal. 

Howard stated on Monday's
radio show that he spoke with
his mommy during the taping of
AGT last week; any talking with
mommy was all in his head as he
frequently relies on his mommy
personality to survive and assure
he stays in the 1980's where he
believes he is living.

Yes, Howard admitted to wanting to be left alone to eat alone, and is under some fantasy he is a young boy watching his weight for his big show business career that does not exist. Old man special needs judge has tons of maintenance and upkeep with the wigs, the makeup, the teeth, and he has to get out of that spanx body girdle before he can drink any liquids or he will explode and have to be carted off to a hospital for colon replacement surgery; I mean it's embarrassing, but earning an honest dollar is embarrassing for a jerk who existed on sponsor payola and product placement ads and constant on-air promoting of hotels and restaurants, and has to keep working into his 60's under self-hypnosis [aka meditation] that he is a real star on his way up instead of a payola king getting corporate filler jobs nobody wants.

Photo posted on Beth's
Instagram site 3/9/15; the
photo is about 3 yrs old.

Everyone heard the news that media mogul Sam Simon has passed away due to battling cancer for many years and Bethie didn't miss a beat proving how famous she is by posting a photo on her Instagram site grinning like a moron when she visited the dying mogul in Los Angeles about three years ago trying to get some dough out of the old guy before he bought the farm. Sam was famous for devoting his final days to helping the animal rights group, PETA, with his friend Pam Anderson.

Sam Simon donated one million dollars to help stop seal slaughter [pictured above with Pam Anderson]. How much did Howard and Beth donate to finance Beth's fat dream of her name on a building at the North Shore Animal League? A giant "unknown"; oh what a noble cause, Beth's fat name on a building, wow, stop the presses, oh but wait! It is all to honor the dog she overfed into an early grave; oh that's okay then.

Take that NBC - oh, Howard's network. Well Howard only cares about Howard. He could care less about any animal rights even though his stupid wife is a self-proclaimed animal rights activist, yes, she has the right to wear all the animals she pleases to cover her sagging body to show how rich and famous she is.

Sam Simon joined in the protest of the NBC show "Animal practice" in 2012. It lasted only one season due to PETA protesting the use and abuse of live animals. This made an empty spot in programming to insert that awful show "Whitney" to come back for a second season. Yes, Stern's stooge and hire, Whitney Cummings, in her show "Whitney" which was canceled [in 2013] after two seasons because it was a shitty show featuring another aged hagatha from the Stern stable who blatantly reduces their age while running to a plastic surgeon for face lifts and lipo. 

50 Shades of Frump

Beth O'Fully Shaved [according to public statements made by Beth and her husband Howard Stern] loves the S&M bullshit since we are not sure these two specimens can have, ummm, relations, any other way, oh and the shaving right? 

Total fun and games as if these two even see each other anymore aside from appointments in the Big Apple cleaning out the Persian Cat infestation [Beth and her minions keep finding homeless Persian cats when it's all staging] and being the sole rescuers of the abandoned cats that a bunch of mean people refuse to feed and leave them homeless for Bethie to set up a meet and greet for a giant photo shoot at the charity that pays her salary, the North Shore Animal League (NSAL) before the animals drop dead or are shoved onto real foster homes in New Jersey. 

Below is an actual photo from Beth's Instagram showing her bizarre sleeping selfie fetish, flat on her back with an animal placed on her body...50 Shades of a Lunatic Facing 50 Years Old.

The New York Daily News, et al, loved "Bitter Moon"
at the time of its release. 

The famous director and fugitive from the U.S. injustice system [oops, did I say that? Not me] Roman Polanski with his 1992 film Bitter Moon that is now available on NetFlix and that no one remembers it was an S&M film featuring his stunning wife and quite fitting, Hugh Grant, who is of dubious sexual orientation and fits quite well into the seedy world of role playing and game playing unable to confront men or women on equal terms. Miss Plain Jane Dakota can have her stupid film 50 Shades of Grey Hairs, the bit's been done a bunch of times before and by much prettier women.

Howard Stern tries to hate Roman Polanski, seen here in
 drag from his film "The Tenant" when in reality, Howard has a
 drag obsession and is envious of Polanski.

Jealous much, Howard? We would like to see Howard score such a prize, and this is after having children, something Beth is still pondering at the bitter age of 45 thinking she is her brain's age of 14. The photo is from a few years ago at the Cannes Film Festival. We would love to see Beth O'Nobody get a chance to appear on the red carpet at Cannes sans having to spend more than a few horizontal nights aboard more than a few yachts of ill repute.

Got Milk, Howard? What? No dairy?
What about that cow you married?
Stuck on the farm? Nope, stuck on the
ocean hoping a sea witch will snatch
her and carry her to Davy Jones' locker.

Did Howard Stern condemn "Bitter Moon" due to its director?  Why is the entire world fed up with Stern? Well, New York and Hollywood, because he is full of bullshit. A fake, a phony, a talentless pariah who managed to scrounge around and find a second career for himself on a crappy reality show on free TV after tons of plastic surgery on his face with a wife sequestered to her posh digs in Hamptonia bothering her personal charity NSAL to build an entire new extension to house cats with her foundation and her name on the building, Bianca's Furry Friends, yet seeking public donations to build it...oh right, Rachael Ray, donating pennies from her shitty dog food company from each bag sold and paid for by whom? Oh, the public, until the amount reaches her press released amount of $500,000. At the rate the food is sold off to animal shelters and retail pet stores where puppy mill dogs are sold, it will seem to take forever before Beth can see her name on a giant building at NSAL unless Stern coughs up the dough.

Will phony Howard stop trashing Miss 50 Shades of Frump
since they will supposedly be Internet buddies with 
Whalerock Industries with their personal Internet channels? 
Yes, Stern is being dumped onto the Internet with no more TV deals
to air his shitty satellite radio show. How can that be?

Terminator Beth points to the
next show slated for cancellation
from network television. 

And what about Stern's paid stooge wife? Oh, the professional pointer Beth already showed us the next show slated for cancellation as old lady Meredith Vieira is hitting the unemployment line very soon with her boring talk show being kicked off television. Beth is a show terminator, with her moron book tour promoting a phony story about a purebred Persian cat who found a way into the mansion of Beth Stern to make her famous and give her a reason to show up on television since the woman is an unknown pariah who married Howard Stern so he could get a job on television and appear to be mentally stable [and squelch the rumors, right? Funny Ryan Seacrest is having no problems remaining single and being a superstar on television aside from being a superstar TV producer].

Not sure which is the cheaper and faker project that Howard Stern
produced, Beth or that Yoda the cat and his bullshit book.

Life is tough when you have to earn an
honest living, right old lady Scotto? Oh, but
she loves Howard & Beth, with Beth being
a frequent pest on her morning TV show.

We love hearing about Miss Mafia whose father worked for the Gambino Crime Family, with her son recently arrested for allegedly stealing designer purses [according to online news articles dated 3/8/15]. Well Beth is in no danger, all her designer stuff are fakes and sold on those same streets of NYC where all those Persian cats are found that Beth has to save [according to her Instagram account; you know, all those pesky Persian cats wandering around the streets of NY and various boroughs].

Mini Monday Mystery

Robin Quivers used to have about 10 holes in that right ear to wear diamond studs plus one enormous heavy earring only in her right ear, with the left ear having what looks like only two or three holes. Who knows what that right ear looks like now since she is covering it up since her recently publicized staged cancer battle.

A bunch of holes with no earrings looks pretty bad. Then Robin disappeared from the public view and re-emerged with a wig and facelift with the right ear covered up with a wig.



On the Howard Stern Channel 9 TV show, Robin wore dozens of earrings in the right ear. You can see now, she completely covers up that right ear. Is it due to plastic surgery on the ear? Or a botched facelift with bumps and scarring? It's a mystery.