Kiss My Asp

Halloween is almost here as I hope all the little witches and warlocks have a fun time contacting their dead relatives asking them where they stashed the loot and this time, don't take any lame excuses and don't let them break the connection saying they have to deal with their sick feline and have to call their personal veterinarian to make a house call who is on the payroll to kill their cat again for them ASAP since they've got theater tickets and can't miss that curtain call [since they are all already dead including the cat and the ghosts keep repeating this scenario]. Threaten to reveal their secrets in a tell-all book, that should do it. 

So funny that Howard Stern failed to get the KISS Town Hall today, Oct 29, and instead it was SiriusXM's other resident evil host Keith Roth. Not sure there is enough bad plastic surgery and wigs here in this photo but Howard would fit right in with this group. Maybe Howard can charter a bus and take the group to his Florida Fortress & Cosmetic Plastic Surgery Center and pretend they are rescuing a feral kitten stuck in a drain as a cover story to fix these zombies and make them look human again. Better yet, forget it, it's a lost cause.

SiriusXM Town Hall October 29, 2018 with those hilarious
wigs and plastic surgery. I guess Gene Simmons got a bad
eyelift aside from the fact his prescription makes his
eyes look like huge brown saucers.

10-29-18, Bette Midler's NY
Restoration Project, 22nd annual
Hulaween event.

Bette Midler's costume looked pretty bad but of course everyone is waiting to see what the famous supermodel with her own clothing line and TV shows will wear for this year's Halloween, the famous Heidi Klum.

I guess the latest royal couple Dirty Harry and Crazy Meghan won't be at Heidi's legendary Halloween party since they were sent on a wild goose chase to remote parts of the globe so she can conjure up some sort of hilarious looking baby bump while Harry is amazed that a hermaphrodite can reproduce. Well, ask George Clooney.

We love it that Beth Stern models the same type of bathing suits as the famous transvestite Caitlyn Jenner since they both have weird man bodies and their clothes have to be all crooked to detract from their bizarre thick body proportions.

Stuttering John Melendez's podcast continues to be more interesting than the stale Stern satellite radio show with John's guest tomorrow being KC Armstrong, former Stern show staffer who used to go on the same modeling/acting cattle calls as Beth Ostrosky when he lived in NYC. You can tweet John and he will address your questions during the podcast. It's way more than Howard Stern will ever do. Good luck getting a question answered that is not a pre-arranged plug for a product or for his plastic microphone Beth O.

Just in time for Halloween:

Beth is going as an area rug this year for Halloween

due to a Botox mishap.

Halloween is for suckers, right Howard? Have you contacted Beth yet? She found your coin purse in the taxi. It had your GPS microchip inside attached to all of the coins in case Beth accidentally spent any of it.

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