First Responder

On Wednesday's Howard Stern stale satellite radio show [Sept 26], he barely remembered to insert a prepared statement in response to this blogger about his phone call visits to his medical doctor who is actually a psychoanalyst, one of the most overpaid docs you can go to that pander to the rich and bored who may need an alibi. 

In the prior blog entry dated 9-26-18 [posted at 1:36 AM, well before Howard's Wednesday live broadcast], this blogger opined that Howard rarely goes outside his apartment, the one away from his second ball and chain Beth Ostrosky who wanted so much to live in Howard's original married bachelor's pad, that he even bought the apartment beneath his for Beth, hoping that would suffice. This blogger stated the obvious, that Howard Stern has a phone fetish and even does his alleged doctor visits via phone or sometimes Skype depending on if he can dress up and appear as a character since it is no secret, that is another one of Howard's fetishes.

This famous blogger asked Howard to provide some code or something to clue us in if his therapist doctor's visits are actually by phone. Howard barely remembered to insert his weak response, which is below, but only addresses his alleged recent visit, not all his standing alleged appointments. So how did Howard set up his response? He set it up by talking about the hot topic of SITTING, yes, as in literally sitting around all day waiting for things to happen. Wow, really a relevant topic. Ha. So he had to talk all about SITTING and everywhere he went he just sat. 

9-26-18, Howard Stern Satellite Radio Show. Howard talks about his shrink [emphasis added]:

Howard: "No matter how much I've worked out in the past, I have a belly. I don't work out as hard, my titties are growing. ...I strip off my Tommy Johns and there I am nude in front of that harsh light and I take a good look at myself and I get disgusted. And then to make matters worse while I'm nude, I turn around and look at my fat ass."

Robin [Quivers, Howard's obese diet expert and day old news reader]: "Your ass is not fat."

Howard: "It's not that it's fat, it's dimply and rippled. I don't even know how to explain it. Then I get on the scale. That's my torture for the morning and I get on that scale and I'm three pounds heavier than my weight should be. I can't believe it, I didn't eat that much yesterday but again I had no physical activity. I sat there till 2-3:00 in the afternoon meeting with everyone. I get home, I'm exhausted, I'm sitting in front of the computer. Oh, and then I went to the shrink and I sat there with him. My tookus doesn't even feel any type of human (stammering) frustration where you have to go find food. My ass is like, "What's going on here? What happened to the human body being exercised?"

Robin: "Going to your shrink, you don't feel better the next day or that afternoon?"

Howard: "A little bit for a while but then it wears off. I should go live in the woods. I bet if I did, my ass would look nice. Eat berries and bark. I'll look like Mark Wahlberg. That guy works out like eight hours a day. He gets up at two in the morning to start working out. Dude, you're really into it. You might want to look into that."

The end.

Yeah Howard, sodium pentothal wears off pretty quickly. Doesn't the shrink race to his phone during your visit to phone his stockbroker? Does he use a phony phone call voice? So he is saying he managed to SIT with his doc on Tuesday. Geez, I guess Howard may have to show up in person once in awhile because doctors are supposed to actually see you in person to prescribe drugs, especially if the drugs are addictive and the patient's file has a "fibber" flag on it. 

So on Tuesday [Sept 25], Howard must have been in a daze making that rare in-person visit to his psycho doc because of the thought of having a Beth-free weekend since she trekked to Los Angeles for her annual shilling for the American Humane Association's (AHA) bullshit dog awards show. Howard just sat and waited in a stupor staring blankly at his computer screen waiting for his handler to show up and tell the rarely vertical ripple-assed DJ what to do. Thanks Howard for the response even though it sounds like you need to stop trying to be another Woody Allen with the neurotic behavior, always fretting about yourself. Howard tried to mimic Woody Allen from day one on his stale terrestrial radio show back in the 1980's. His Woody impersonations on the air were pathetically bad, oh, my parents hate me, they don't want me around, I'm bad at everything, I hate myself, my piano teacher committed suicide!!! Howard hasn't given up on his phony scripted life that's a big borefest forever. Now he added a Big O in the mix and hoped he wouldn't have to marry her and he wants his fan to think that his wedding in a now defunct-restaurant and bar [that is scrambling to make a comeback] to a half naked drunk is their real anniversary date while a former male stripper conducted the ceremony. Their 10-year anniversary was in August, yet everyone knows he has been stuck with Beth Ostrosky since they began flirting with disaster, so this 10-year anniversary bullshit Howard and Beth are talking up is just that. Bullshit.

Beth is still trying to unload that first Yoda the Cat book and posted a photo on her IG show of an alleged recent book signing when she normally does the kiddie book signing bit at schools in Pittsburgh and North Carolina, especially when she needs to pick up her paid servant Amy Grets to babysit her on her jaunts around the country claiming they are charity missions for her foundation Bianca's Furry Friends. At least Beth got one Martian to show up to her book signing. That kid got stuck with 100 books. I hope her planet enjoys the bonfire. Those stale Yoda the Cat books were a huge failure, with her second one the Sterns just ignore and threw in the trash about Yoda Gets a Buddy and then the vet had to confiscate him or Beth would have killed Yoda's little buddy since it became deathly ill under her maniacal care at Stalag Beth in the Hamptons. 

As usual, zero notables showed up to Beth's horrible Hero Dog Awards taping on Sept 29 and consisted of mainly Hallmark Channel losers since it's a Hallmark Channel production. Aside from that, real celebs do not support this no-list function because the faux socialite Lois Pope, a sponsor and co-founder of the award show, is a big Trump supporter and tried to get him to take one of her rescue dogs to become the official White House dog but Trump was having none of that shit and kicked the old bag to curb. She got all mad and was forced to keep the dog herself and then refused to go back to Trump's Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida to hold her snooty faux socialite events and nobody cared. Poor Beth is treading water trying to hang on as a shill for the AHA that turns a blind eye to any animal abuse by the Hollywood film and TV industry. Beth doesn't care since it gets her to Hollywood where she is just dying to live. The Hero Dog Awards are aired on the Hallmark Channel that got Stuck With The Sterns and there is no foreseeable hope they will be free from them anytime soon unless they CANCEL the airing of this debacle trying to give disabled and injured dogs an award when they need to scrap this event because it is a sickening exploitation of these poor dogs who should be kept away from stress and anxiety and not dragged on a red carpet and on stage. These people are nuts. If you want to give dogs an award than do it, but not exploit them so Beth can get on TV playing award show host in the town she is dying to live in and be known as a celebrity instead of a hashtag joke. 

Howard revealed last year that he has a stepdaughter so no wonder he looks forward to sending Beth around the country on wild goose chases playing into her fantasy she is in demand so Howard can have fun making love with his selfie.

In other news, Sharon Osbourne mouthed off in a Stern interview in early September since she knew she was getting Simon's foot placed firmly on her ass to kick her off his show again.

#dawgshed #howardisadawg #bethisshapedlikeashed
#herodogawards #nsal  #bff  #bethstern  #howardstern
#stern  #betho   #markwahlberg #trump  #florida
#noelclare  #noeldoesntcare  #beth  #howard
#americanhumaneassociation #aha #sharon #osbourne
#xfactor  #agt