Stern Bombs in Cleveland

Howard Stern reading his scripted speech for the
Hall of Fame event on 4-14-18 where he sounded
like a giant idiot.

While President Trump was busy bombing Syria early Saturday morning, Howard Stern was bombing Cleveland on Saturday night with his presence by making a giant ass out of himself with his scripted speech that stunk to high heaven. Reportedly, Howard was first out of the gate for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame broadcast since no one can stand him and wanted the jerk to jerk off and leave as soon as possible. As already blogged about, Howard was inducting Bon Jovi into the Hall of Fame in Cleveland and Howard thought this was his big chance to audition in front of a few producers and media moguls in the audience.

Not sure what the worse part of his induction speech was, if it was the gay stuff with Howard pretending to masturbate onstage, or if it was making a joke about the death of hundreds of thousands of people through war and pestilence and comparing that to Bon Jovi's record sales and gross receipts, then he basically roasted Bon Jovi and their songs and made fun of them and sang some of the lyrics while the audience joined in hoping to MOVE ALONG the OVERLY LONG AND BORING induction speech with Howard waving his arms and bullshitting his way through an embarrassing performance. Howard Stern's performance was like he was auditioning for the judges of "American's Got Talent" (AGT) and should have been buzzed off the stage. Hey Howard, why don't you send your induction speech tape to Simon Cowell? He may let you audition this year for AGT and maybe you can win some money.

I'm not sure Howard made enough disgustingly ugly faces that night at the Hall of Fame ceremony on 4-14-18, but he was fighting with those fresh Botox injections on that bizarre face. I hope Howard got a
refund for that botched nose job.

I am sure if anyone was interested, they could listen to the uploaded videotape of Howard Stern's induction speech from various online sources and of course on YouTube for Bon Jovi for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, and it was more of a roast than a speech to honor the band from yesteryear. Howard even mentioned the band's use of Aquanet damaged the earth's ozone layer [yes, someone actually wrote that for Howard - I mean, talk about lame ass humor, maybe Molly Kimmel wrote it for him since she's excruciatingly unfunny as the head writer of her husband's flailing late night talk show], and then had to do his hand gesture of pleasuring himself, more than once, on stage since Howard is obsessed with male genitalia and pandered to the openly gay member of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame committee who decides who is accepted and who is kept out, Mr. Jann Wenner who is also the co-founder of Rolling Stone magazine and is a buddy of Howard Stern. Geez, Howard was all excited and HOPPED UP on something but I guess only his weavedresser knows for sure.

Yeah, Howard seems to have surrounded himself with openly gay people like the founder of Sirius satellite radio, the man in a dress who is now a woman who gave Howard his first big deal with Sirius and they have been floundering ever since. The huge money deal forced them into almost bankruptcy and had to merge with XM satellite radio, well, you know the rest. Howard's two channels on SiriusXM have been operating in the red for a decade and have to be packed with commercials aside from Howard's constant product placement ads that he gets paid for since he is never getting another big payout again, and the company reduces his operating budget annually with his own personal salary holding steady at an estimated 40 million per year.

No, I didn't forget about Howard's other half who is half guy and half shemale, Beth Ostrosky Stern. Some may have noticed in the red carpet photos from the event that are available on a bunch of sites online, that Beth never let go of Howard. I know, she didn't want to be cut out of any photos, but normally they take photos together and then separately, but remember Howard admitted to having to use a walking stick not long ago and wanted to purchase a cane, and as I have stated before, now both Beth and Howard are rarely vertical nowadays. Geez, these two had better sober up since they want to be ready when Hollywood comes calling when they want to hire these two for a remake of "Turnabout" (1940). 

Howard's big induction speech had to be done without a podium for some reason, so he kept trying to spread out his legs and balance himself and took his hands in and out of his pockets in between simulating stroking his male organ. Makes you wonder about his mental state. Geez, will HBO give this burlesque comic his own show? I highly doubt it unless they have an all stripper channel with Howard inserted so people know when they can take a break and go to the fridge.

Howard wears those same stale clothes he got when
he was a judge on AGT. That jacket must be pretty stinky by now
as is that other thing hanging from his arm.

Howard paired that same jacket [left] with that same big stupid vest [right] and wore them for
the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony. I guess Beth is mandated to wear pink whenever Howard wears that
dumb velveteen jacket that looks like Howard stole it from Hugh Hefner's closet when he did his radio show
from the Playboy Mansion around 1999.

We loved Beth's spackle makeup and huge thick wig as she stuffed herself into that mermaid dress that should have been cut loose and thrown back into the ocean. I hope Beth had enough elastic and stretch to that dress she wore or audiences would have heard a big rip and tear when Beth was finally told to sit down and stop groping all the famous men at the event.

As already blogged about on April 12, we knew Beth would share a spotlight with the real model Paulina Porizkova as Beth glommed onto her thinking they are both models when everyone doesn't even think they are both of the same species. Beth was swollen and a bloated mess with too much makeup. Paulina's husband of The Cars was actually inducted into the Hall of Fame and Beth acted like she thought Howard was inducted too instead of just a stooge presenter coming off as a dirty old man burlesque comic who is just filler while the strippers change their costumes.

Well, this event was the biggest thing in these two pitiful people's lives so let them think they will be discovered and launched into fame instead of just dumped back on the radio dial where Howard scrounges for bagel money for his pigeons on a wire and Beth struggles to keep getting cats bred in a field for her and she can pretend to rescue them before dumping them onto feline foster homes.

#dawgshed  

#howardstern  #rockandrollhalloffame

#cleveland   #bethstern

#bethwasnothotincleveland
#bonjovi  #paulinaporizkova #simon
#weave #beth #paulina #thecars