Closing Ranks

The Met Gala theme this year
is Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the
Catholic Imagination.

May 7th is coming very soon, the First Monday in May where the fashion elite meet the iconic celebrities and media moguls of the globe and everyone is bartering for the hottest ticket of the year, the invitation to the annual Metropolitan Museum of Art, Fashion Institute gala benefit where everyone who is anyone will be front and center checking out the exhibits and not all of them are hanging on mannequins.

Anna Wintour called on God this year to keep her exclusive event free from the Sterns for yet another year as sources allege that QAnon is reportedly dropping crumbs that Howard is pressuring his Sirius bosses to get him and Beth into the Met Gala this year, no matter what it takes. I mean, obviously Howard Stern has never been invited to this exclusive event and obviously his second clothes horse can't get in, you know, Beth O who got the cheap ass wedding ring for her anxious little hand [little is figurative when referring to Beth O], the invisible european model who is literally dying to get into the Wintour event to finally prove to the bullies back home in the Pitts that she finally made it and is super famous even though no one knows what a Beth O actually is other than a cat snatcher who photographs herself constantly and posts the pix on Instagram.

Sarah Jessica Porky normally scores a ticket to the Met Gala but we aren't sure if she can fit into any designer clothes this year. Those pant seams don't look too secure. She'll have to pull a Beth Stern and order from Net-a-Knock-Off and get the seams let out by Felix the Tailor. I am sure he will work on loan from the Sterns. She is launching her own bridal shoe collection as an addition to other shoe collections but she may need to launch that diet program too.

Howard Stern has been pretty ticked off lately since getting his wife Beth back in his own corral since she shut down another cable TV show. This time it's Ali Wentworth's show called "Nightcap" on the cable channel called Pop which is co-owned by CBS. It's an obscure piece of garbage that was kicked off the airwaves which is why Ali had to take Beth hoping Howard would promote it and throw some investment dollars at it to keep his wife on television. Readers of this blog remember Dame Beth-Man was the first to break the news that Beth was on the set and filming an episode of the show [ref: Beth Fan Page 5-1-16 "Punch A Higher Floor"]. 

Item originally posted on the BFP May 1, 2016.

When Ali Wentworth appeared last week on Radio Andy, he asked her about her show "Nightcap" and she said it had been canceled. Andy was also a guest star on that show in a lame attempt by Ali to save the sitcom which was beyond unfunny and horrid but what can you expect from Ali. Not much, especially since she is married to the allegedly gay leprechaun who thought he would get permanent shelf space in Hillary Clinton's cabinet providing she was elected as President of the U.S. Nightcap is now headed for permanent rehab while Ali plugged her new book on the Andy Cohen satellite radio show:

Meanwhile Beth was shuttled out of town last week to her Florida Facelift & Fat Ass Reduction Fortress where she posted a photo of herself with her bloated blowfish face since she's got to keep up all those fillers and Botox injections just in case someone is desperate enough to let her on their TV show so Howard will promote it free of charge. Beth posted a photo again only outside of her Florida Mystery House because only the Ostrosky Family are allowed to be photoshopped inside in the foyer with Howard and Beth, and the guest stars are all photoshopped outdoors. At least Harriet the Spy got to the actual house while Whitney Cummings was relegated to having Beth grope her outside near the trees three years ago.

Whitney never made it to the Botoxology Basement inside the main house
and was photographed along the driveway. I guess everyone thought
her face was bloated enough.

Such an obvious wig Howard is wearing here. What a joke.

We can't wait for the big Met Gala event next week as we wonder what diversions and stunts Beth will think up to pretend she doesn't care that she's ignored. Will she kill another cat? Trip another maid? Throw herself down another flight of stairs? We can't wait to watch what happens.

#dawgshed  #howardstern
#bethstern  #allisonstern  #metgala
#firstmondayinmay  #annawintour
#marymccormackneverforgets