Old Man River

Old Man Stern never gives up as Sirius is slowly dying.

As Howard's fan may recall, Howard Stern mentioned on his stale satellite radio show on Wednesday, March 14, that he was "DREADING going out tonight" with his brother and sister in law while they are in town because he doesn't want to have to go to the bathroom in public which is another old man problem that we really don't need to hear about, but Howard knows his fan in the group home loves to hear these kind of stories. We have no idea which part of the O Family they hail from but some people may remember Beth is the middle messed up child with one older and one younger brother. Beth also talks about her nieces and nephews once in awhile on her public social media sites that amazingly never grow.

So we find that cheapskate scumbag Howard scored freebie corporate tickets to a special SiriusXM performance of the Bruce Springsteen Broadway show on Wednesday night. Remember back in October, Jimmy Kimmel and his wife treated Howard and Beth to the same Broadway show as a thank you gift for appearing on Kimmel's low-rated TV talk show when it was taping from Brooklyn. So funny how Howard refuses to pay for anything. Nothing like a broke billionaire hobbling around NY desperate to appear rich to Beth's buttinsky relatives.

Thank you to the Beth Fan who emailed this to me.

Pretty hilarious that Howard has problems staying vertical when it's Beth with the long and documented history of falling all over the place. Howard frequently talks about this on his radio show and even Beth documented herself in the ER when she fell in the now defunct Hamptons restaurant called Harlow. Oh yeah, funny how it shut down after the fall [as I have already blogged about].

Although, for quite some time now, whenever Howard is in public he has been struggling and Beth, his rarely vertical wife, sometimes has to hold his hand and they both seem to not be able to negotiate the smallest step onto a sidewalk.

Some people are gossiping he is suffering from arthritis and alleged prostate problems and thinks that selfie pleasure cures the latter when it's just the excuse not the cure. There is no cure for Old Fartdom. 

Maybe Sirius can get him a medical excuse so he can work from his empty Florida fortress and be ignored there instead of being ignored in New York while having to spend so much money on a physical studio with an out-dated polyester velvet couch and curtains looking like some gay bachelor pad from 1970.

It's no secret that Howard wants a full-on new talk show studio like the Sirius Town Hall setup where celebs are interviewed at the studio by everyone but Howard. He is desperate to have his radio show videotaped and sold to a cable show on some subscription service and can't face it that the subscriber-only Howard TV cable show On Demand was a crashing failure. He also failed to publicize exactly how many people subscribed to the channel before it ran out of money since Howard wants to be paid twice for each radio show. Somehow he thinks appearing on camera equals more money. He isn't famous, just a stooge behind a microphone reading from a script and he wants more money. We can't wait for Howard-360 to result in an unquantifiable blip on the subscriber scale. Howard is also struggling with a work product for his stale Howard Stern Productions and is struggling with reality. He truly believes he is Jay Leno, Johnny Carson, and Jimmy Fallon all rolled into one and thinks he is equal to real late night talk show hosts when he's just a aged misogynist morning zoo DJ who is having problems getting anyone into his studio to agree to a pre-approved list of scripted questions where Howard just reads them off and the celebrity suffers through the borefest until their agent finally lets them outta there.

In other old man news, Kathy Griffin looked like she got a new facelift after her public humiliation ritual and head shaving per the rules of the Lesbianati to re-emerge as a short wigged clone of Sharon Osbourne as she attends the LA premier of the Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling. And who could stand Shandling? A little devil told me that he is now in hell accusing Brad Grey of wiretapping again.

#dawgshed  #sternforum
#kathygriffin  #bethstern
#cheapskatehowardspendszeroonticketstospringsteen