Swamp Thing

Ever since Howard Stern bought that Florida Facelift & Phony Foster Feline Fortress, this blogger has reported that he is desperate to get a corporate sponsor for that white elephant that he overpaid for since it's an overblown giant money pit having to be renovated to accommodate his Botoxology and Cosmetic Surgery Center where Beth visits every few months for about one week at a time with a family member stooge in tow to bump up her face so she can be camera ready when some daytime TV show needs filler, and Beth's got more fillers than a homeless man's mattress.

On Tuesday's radio show [1/23], Howard brought up the issue again of moving his stale satellite radio show from New York to his Florida home and wants Sirius to have a Florida studio, duh, we get it, Howard is inferring they sponsor and finance his own giant overblown Florida mansion that is left empty with only a section of the house that's used. Beth mainly stays outside to pose for selfies and Howard takes some pictures that will show up later in some C-list lifestyle magazines so he can claim some sort of business expense while the mansion is basically shut down and not used for a total of about 11 months out of the year.

So here we go again with Howard desperate to get Sirius to sponsor the corporate mansion in Florida where he entertains some client of his agent and publicist or a talk show host as if we haven't heard this rhetoric before. We know Rosie O'Donnell tried to broadcast her SiriusXM radio show from her home and it failed miserably, with her trying to get celebrity guests to phone in to the show and it was boring. But then, Howard is boring whether he is in the Sirius studios or not with many of his shows taped in advance, especially if a musical guest shows up and doesn't want to sing on demand in the early morning hours, so those segments are on tape, who cares anyway, it's just that dull Stern interviewing someone on their way down the fame ladder.

This blogger has blogged about Howard broadcasting
from Florida on the BFP 2-25-16 "Slick". 

Howard is actually panicking over the idea of live TV cameras in his studio since he can't always control what they are capturing and he may fall into bad lighting and his giant facelift and Botox bulges become more obvious in HD. He wants a movie studio type setup in his Florida home where he can control everything and Beth can parade around with her wigs and makeup and frozen Botox face and become Howard's new sidekick with Robin being moved to only a news reader for 15 minutes at the end of the broadcast.

The plan would be that Howard permanently move Beth to the swamp and he only visits to tape his satellite radio show with his primary residence still in New York. The Hamptons bit is played out and the Sterns are struggling to maintain their buttinsky partying and getting free booze and eats from the neighbors with this blogger reporting exclusively that Beth was on the wagon last summer so evidently the neighbors are sick of hosting the rarely vertical wife of Howard Stern and pulling her off the chandeliers. But Beth is basically disappearing from the Hamptons social scene with only a few random appearances at some wildlife center fundraiser since she can't get back into Hamptons Magazine. She barely shows up now for the annual cover party for Social Life Magazine since Howard can never come up with a sponsor and the magazine has to try and get someone to sponsor the loser event. Howard pays for one issue featuring his airbrushed wife and I suppose thinks the magazine should spring for the party in her honor.

But one wonders why Howard refuses to participate in the radio rankings race, like from Talk Stream Live. Doesn't he want to use it in a bid for more dough out of Monster Malone or Oscar Meyer's weiner? Scared much Howard? We know the actual number of listeners of the stale Stern satellite radio show would be a riot. Sirius knows they are STUCK WITH STERN and are just absorbing the loss by packing his channels with commercials and adding other channels with more content with Radio Andy taking off as well as the special music channels like when they have the limited run channels like the Barbra Streisand Channel and the Billy Joel channel, and so forth, with the new car industry actually staving off bankruptcy for the flailing satellite service.

Time for a new segment, "BJ Beth". Howard reported that he doesn't give or receive oral sex but this blogger found two instances where he does in fact get BJs from Beth. In 2003 Howard said Beth gives him oral sex [ref: BFP 1-12-18 "#BalanceTonPorc"] and this one from 2005:

So I guess that's why Howard has said that Beth prefers it when he wears a condom since
I guess she doesn't want mouth sores or infections since it would show and she needs to be
camera ready for her big job of doing nothing.

I bet these girls are sure sorry they were the losers in the battle for the big zircon wedding band from Howard. Yep, Beth was the big winner alright.

Beth fans already knew about the Sterns' plan to foster cats in Florida [see excerpt below] because everyone knows that Howard wants to push Beth farther south and out of his Hamptons Hair. He is tired of his routine of weekends with Beth who rarely gives him a BJ so wants to switch it up. He will visit Florida and skip out on the Hamptons. All he's got really is chasing down the Seinfelds having to pay Jessica Seinfeld to hang out with her via her bullshit Good+ Foundation [formerly Baby Buggy] that still does nothing but give an African American woman a used baby buggy once a year. Now we've got the Matt Lauer debacle so that's played out too as someone to bug in the Hamptons and Matt skipped the Beth NSAL Awards last month since he was being hunted by the #MeToo women's brigade and hiding from divorce lawyers.

Beth did have someone start a Beth Stern Fan Page on Facebook
to try and detract from this blog and confuse people
into thinking it was the same thing. They used to publish
Beth's press releases but it is now a defunct site
because no one can compete with the real Beth Fan Page.

Pretty funny that Dawgshed.com brought up Sal the Stockbroker again and his roast of Beth and want him to take over the Artie chair.

We know Artie was forced off the Stern radio show and went into a tailspin mimicking his comic idol a bit too closely with that giant knife he stabbed himself with and ended up in a psych ward. Artie was skating on thin ice with Stern since he would goof up and not kiss Howard's ass and be jealous Howard scored a "model". Artie even had the nerve to come up with a much younger girlfriend showing up Beth and making her seem like Beth could be that girl's mother. He couldn't remember his favorite film was "Flirting With Disaster" and then stated Beth played a lesbian volleyball player in the movie and how hot she was when she only posed in a one-piece fugly volleyball outfit with a one-liner that she screeched and that was it. Her screen time was about a minute. Howard couldn't take Artie constantly being called to Hollywood to do pilots for TV shows and getting genuine movie offers. So it was curtains for Artie and he almost took himself out in a bizarre way to appease Howard's ego and try and get back in his good graces but it failed.

Artie Lange attempted suicide in the same way as his
idol John Belushi did in a skit on Saturday Night Live.

Artwork by Lingvistov.com.
Go ahead Beth, steal this idea
and pretend you thought it up.

Since Howard has become a giant failure sequestered to a burnt out satellite dish that keeps getting lost in space, he is now Cat-Man that loves to appear on his wife's show, "The Real Housewife of Instagram" because Howard Stern Productions can barely afford to produce a weekly bagel for his staff let alone a real show for Beth on television.




#florida  #cat-man  #betho
#sirius   #satellite
#howardissiriusaboutdumpingbethinflorida
#talkstreamlive