The Old Gray Mare...

...has to dye her roots a dark color since her entire head is now going gray under those hair extensions that are getting moldy and discolored as Beth is terrified of going swimming since those extensions glued and weaved into that scalp will become one big massive knot. 

Howard Stern is busy with being an ignored pariah over the holiday break in Florida at his White Elephant that he has yet to get a sponsor for and has a temp kitten rescue room gimmick all set up for the tax man to investigate should the need arise. 

Howard was giving passersby a chuckle when he propped his mare up against a wall so she didn't fall down drunk head first in the sand and swept out to sea. Well, it might have made a good story for 2017 for his stale satellite radio show as we wait to see who gets the ax since Howard's budget is normally adjusted downward each calendar year by the head honchos at the SiriusXM corporation who are desperate to get advertisers to pay for the loser Howard Stern channels [100 and 101] as they wine and dine the superstar Andy Cohen who saved the day with his awesome lineup of radio talk show hosts including Sandra Bernhard, who Howard is so jealous of he can't even acknowledge she is now a radio talk show host and is better at it than he is as he stalks the hallways looking like an aged cigarette stick with a paunch and flabby ass.

I know it looks like reigns around Beth's neck but that's her flying

saucer hat since she has to protect all that plastic surgery

from the elements as the menopausal nightmare
shows off that gross lipo stomach and
that fugly Oprah Winfrey-looking dress since she has to
cover up those monster legs from candid cameras from those
passing boats filled with spies from The National Enquirer.

Yes, long ago Howard paid to have Beth airbrushed but it got so expensive he decided to learn the technique himself. Howard knows Beth is ugly but what could he do? He's Howard Stern. Who else could the old guy get to follow him around in exchange for doing crappy kitten shows for the Hallmark Channel claiming it's charity work?

Just like Howard Stern, George Clooney's menopausal nightmare is also pushing for a publicity baby. The Clooney Camp is having a tough time finding a surrogate that looks like they are pro-Palestinian and half-Italian who grifted off their famous aunt until they could latch onto the Hollywood crowd to make them famous.

What about the Stern's friend Katie Lee? Oh, back in the day she was as loved as Beth. Remember Katie had her famous meatloaf dish that she served to Billy to get him to propose and we all heard the story from 2003 that Beth used a giant chicken with lemons up its butt to get Howard's heart racing which eventually led to a marriage proposal in 2007 and Beth bragged about it. Howard must have had images of various objects up his butt too, butt that's another story, right Howard? Maybe save that tale for when you have a ton of dead air on that satellite you're sitting on, like everyday of the year.

Rumor has it back in the day, Miss Lee staged a huge drunk intervention for Billy before their impending divorce so she could use it in court. Billy was furious and the marriage ended with Katie getting property in NY and the Hamptons to sell. According to press reports, she now has a posh pad in Tribeca which is a little too close for comfort to Howard's digs away from the corporate Manhattan apts and Stalag Beth in the Hamptons.

Sooo Howard said he isn't getting Jimmy Kimmel to ring in the New Year with him? Wonder who Howard will harass this year as Billy Joel stocks up on the sauce to immunize himself from the Stern strain of the flu while he performs in Florida for aged fossils waiting for God.

Well, time to close down the blog for the year as I try and contact mom to wish her a happy New Year as we continue to mourn the loss of dad as readers of this blog might remember. We haven't given up hope that he will be found [ref: BFP May 8, 2016, Pajama Games].

DBM w/dad in happier times.

#bethostroskystern #howardstern
#newyears #dameedna #happynewyear