Off To See The Wizard

Howard Stern has dead air this week since the entire US is off on Spring Break with real stuff to do and his 112 listeners are off work and not listening to the stale satellite jockey during their morning commute or piped into their corporate offices. So why waste new shows during a holiday break when no one is listening anyway and Howard has a hard time coming up with some aged celeb that needs a bit of free airtime and will resort to the Stern show with his kiss ass interviews.

Howard is just a stale old man on a satellite that is mad he still has to work for a living and support a ton of nonearning family members who take bad pictures of scenery and swamps with a few animals stuck in randomly, yet they all have to be on board with Team Beth and pretend the failed actress, failed model, failed TV spokesperson, failed TV host, failed TV judge and failed celebrity is a bona fide notable who does charity work, when the only charity work Beth does is promote herself on free media sites since she refuses to spend her cash to fund her own personal website. Any cash Beth has she is keeping, she spends nothing on anything and gets her charity, the North Shore Animal League (NSAL) and her foundation Bianca's Furry Friends (BFF) to fund her selfie lifestyle with Howard spending almost nothing on funding her trips and appearances to ensure she is busy away from him so he can have his fun time sans the bearded lady with his buddies Felix the Tailor and Ralph the Stylist along with those cute coffee gophers and lighting boys in Stern's photography studio and posh penthouse away from the corporate Manhattan apts and Stalag Beth in the Hamptons. Oh yes, those boys in and out of his apt are all paid staffers, nothing wrong there, nothing untoward going on there....right.

This might be a record for the Queen of All Media Scams, Beth O'Stern, going to her Florida mansion two times in one month, first on March 1 for that Lois Pope Foundation sponsored event for the Hero Dog Awards [as already reported on this blog on 3-12-16] with Beth as their now permanent spokesperson and host of the annual Hero Dog Awards show in Los Angeles [coming in Sept]. As I have said, it's okay for Beth to earn dough in a community property state but Howard does not, well, that is after being shoved off that judges seat on "America's Got Talent" which was filmed in part in Los Angeles whereby Beth got a piece of the action, a cut of that dough, from the big loaf of Howard Stern. Howard goes into a frenzy at the thought of giving half of his earnings in California to the doughy butt slacker wife of his.

Beth is off to see the Wizard of Botox in Florida with her flying monkeys:

Yes, Beth announced to her paid cat club association followers on Instagram that she will again make that trip to Florida to so-called rescue another cat who has to be dismembered before Beth will consent to take it as a photo prop for her usual 10-days [approx.] photography session before dumping the animal onto stooges already selected by the charity that she works for, NSAL. Beth had to step up her game and tries to ferret out the deformed and dismembered cats since she thought the "cute" cats fully intact were getting a bit boring, and she has to appear as some sort of Mother Theresa to the dying and disabled population of cats, somehow, it's her mission to become a pseudo mom to a bunch of cats and claims it's charity work when all she needs to do is spend some of her what? CASH to empty out the local county animals shelters and start finding those animals homes or set up her own shelter at Stalag Beth in the Hamptons. That house is always empty anyway with her husband photoshopped with a few cats to appear like she lives with him when it's just Beth and her maids for the most part. 

Nope, Beth is doing nothing for anybody but promote herself and she is on a mission to have herself in as many selfies as possible on that free site she thinks is her personal website called Instagram and is obsessed with her plastic surgery face and photographs it at all angles, even with her eyes closed, which is terrifyingly weird and she shows how demented she is.

This is one of many of Beth's bizarre sleeping selfies with her arm outstretched taking the photo for her Instagram site 10-23-15.

All of Beth's trips are paid by both NSAL and her own foundation, BFF, where she also takes a cut of all donations she grabs from the public and from corporate sponsors like the Rachael Ray Foundation and her crappy pet food Nutrish, that is normally on the national FDA recall list for shit ingredients that just might send your animal to an emergency vet hospital.

Mariann from Brooklyn is a paid wackpacker
of the Howard Stern show. She had her own
radio show briefly on Sirius and has to
purchase multiple copies of all of
Beth's books, as does Howard Stern and
they dump cases of them onto the school
system as a "donation".

Beth normally flies to Florida on her broom with her flying monkeys in tow for her Botox bump up and filler fix since she has to maintain that youthful butt face for her Instagram fans, all 200,000 of them yet only about 15 people showed up to her loser ONE book signing in New Jersey with a few paid kids holding up that second loser book for the camera about Yoda the cat and his Buddy. 

Where are all your fans, Beth? Hiding in a Middle Eastern factory filled with computers typing away their glowing comments about how your ass is flat from laying on your back 24/7 taking selfies with your eyes closed holding up your latest captured prison camp cat?

Only about three people in this photo actually
actually had Beth's second book for signing when
Beth appeared at a book store in NJ. Her
second book was such a failure, she only
did one book signing.

So, when did it all go wrong for Beth? Wonder what happened to her big career as a national celebrity that didn't need Howard Stern to make her a star? It was gone when the Wicked Witch of the East was finally shot out of the sky. No one could stand Beth and she has zero friends and suddenly she had to drop Ostrosky and use the Stern name and even that ended up with getting her career in full reverse. 

Howard is a joke now, people are laughing at him, not with him. It would be fine if he got the joke, and laughed along with us at that rarely vertical wine factory he married, but nope, gotta pretend she was equal to Heidi Klum in the modeling and entertainment/entrepreneur world when Beth is just a laughing stock, I mean, she never heard of the Internet? That zero legit modeling photos exist of her anywhere but for some fug online cheapo lingerie company with Beth's monster mammaries and enormous fat thighs with the lipo stomach? I mean, gross.

So what are we supposed to do with this disastrous photo below from her FHM days? Is she wearing some weirdo plastic cone falsie over that baseball on her chest? And the photo is cut off so no one sees her saggy ass and huge legs. We see why Howard and Mel Karmazin had to come up with some gimmick to sell this monster to the public and make her likeable [which failed] even with all the disabled and dismembered cats she poses with, everyone still hates her. She's a phony. Her modeling rickets for the masses somehow never caught on, gee, wonder why. On to the cat gimmick or this specimen would be back at the lab growing mold.

Beth's first solo calendar
funded by Howard Stern and it
was a laughing stock. Who wants to
see a giant fake boob in giant
tranny pants?

Howard and Beth are even desperate enough to stop eating meat to get some attention. Maybe PETA will accept them on one of their posters promoting fish as veggies while pushing chicken off their plates as one wonders why they order it in the first place only to make their big plate demonstration and protest that it exists on their dish at meal times.





















Well, at least Howard has The Don in his corner and maybe he will finally get to sit at a White House dinner and Beth can get the selfie of a lifetime hogging a red carpet on Capitol Hill.