Friday Night Failure

I bet Jimmy Kimmel was so happy that David Letterman retired, Jay Leno quit The Tonight Show and Jimmy Fallon is too big to pander to a local New York shock jock so guess what, Jimmy is tagged as getting stuck with Howard Stern and his wife, whose head keeps growing and growing like an enormous watermelon with crazy eyes.

Normally Jimmy Kimmel had to put up with Howard and his inebriated wife Beth in Los Angeles, and that was tolerable since Stern was not in LA very much. Howard was wheeling and dealing to get hired on NBC and finally badgered Simon Cowell enough that he gave in and let him appear on America's Got Talent (AGT), so yes, Kimmel was stuck with low class Sterns, with Howard thinking he's a comic and Beth Nobody thinking she's a model. But Howard's money is as good as anyone and the desperate DJ would pay anything to have Jimmy as a friend and let him pay his portion of that time share rental in Cabo every December. Howard's a classic old fart, desperate to be in with the "young" crowd ignoring the fact he is married to menopausal pariah who lies about her age and claimed she was a globally famous invisible model.

Since 2013 the Sterns have barged into the Cabo resort with Jimmy Kimmel and his wife at Aniston's rental. In the photo on the right she has to wrap her wig in that thick visor and it's two-toned hair, the blonde on top and that reddish color underneath and hope the sun doesn't tarnish that new hair she bought for the trip.

Howard was amazingly horrible on Jimmy Kimmel's show on Friday night, 10/23/15, and was jabbering away high as a kite desperate to remember his scripted lines. Jimmy is broadcasting from Brooklyn all week desperate to beat the ratings of reruns of the other late night talk shows. But, Jimmy painstakingly fed Stern his lines so Howard didn't have to bring out a piece of paper to read from or check his notes, as it was obvious Stern was taking some chatter pills so he could keep awake and memorize all his canned lines and horrible attempts at making jokes and Jimmy was a pro, gotta hand it to him, he knew exactly his cues to come in to feed Howard the opening line to set up the jokes and to get Stern on the ball with each canned "bit". 

Stern can't stop talking or he will forget his script that he and his staff writer from his show wrote for him, I mean, the interview is on You Tube but I don't recommend it. It's a pathetic image of a man that has had the same schtick for 30 years and refuses to change because what else is he going to do. 

Howard got all his plugs in on Friday's Jimmy Kimmel Live Show, aside from the ones on his head and made sure to name drop John Varvatos who supplies Howard with all those fugly bad fitting clothes Howard wears. Oh yeah, no Beth in sight, just Howard with Johnny Boy.

But at least with his appearance on AGT as a judge it gave Stern some material to talk about on Jimmy's show even though it was painfully unfunny, you see, Stern thinks he's a comedian like Jerry Seinfeld but he just bombed. All the aged has been has is his dismal pre-recorded interview show on Sirius where he keeps hitting buttons on his computer cuing the soundbytes with the pre-recorded interviews with celebrities. Then he has to deal with Robin Quivers, the completely lost dullard who has no clue what her job is other than crimping her wig, while Howard keeps hitting her microphone button on and off while she stumbles through what is supposed to be news items that they think audiences are listening to, as if anyone can stand Stern's dentures for more that five minutes is beyond me. Howard is a scripted mess, and his radio show recorded bits and soundbytes in between tons of commercials since Howard has to supplement his income to keep all his non-earners afloat called family members.

Of course Horsehead Beth got her coveted screen shot sitting her wide ass in the audience on Jimmy's show [has she updated her IMDB page yet?] since AGT banned any screen shots of Beth during the live tapings of the final days of Howard Stern. Everyone was sick of her shit on AGT and canned both of them, because when you hire Stern you get his whole tired entourage including his failed fat model wife with the bucked teeth and lazy eye.

Screenshots from Jimmy Kimmel Live 10/23/15 showing the pathetically bad Howard stern and his pulled back hairline with the bangs pulled down to hide it and his pudged out bloated wife got her camera time.

Howard said to Jimmy Kimmel on Friday night how glad he was his wife loves him and she loves saving animals. Okay, just what animals is she saving? She asks for public donations constantly and stages kitten snatch and dump sessions every few weeks taking tons of selfies and calling it charity work. She badgers the public to buy her books and calendars with her face on them so the public can save the animals, not her. She refuses to stop printing those shitty products and just pay for a building to house cats at the North Shore Animal League (NSAL), which she has been badgering the public for donations for about three years and counting. She and Howard never donate to any charity or they would press release it and brag, nope, Beth hops around like a jack rabbit on coke with wigs plastered on her head and calls it charity work. Beth works for herself, she thinks she is finally famous married to an aged dinosaur and Howard thinks he married a model. Now you see how fucked up his eyesight is along with those scrambled eggs inside his head he calls a brain. Right Howard, you proved to that canned audience at Jimmy Kimmel's studio with the "applause" sign blinking nonstop that you are a pathetic old man, a boring borefest that needs to quietly retire to your Florida surgery center and phony foster kitten camp. 

Beth proves her star power when her personal fan site got a whopping "9 likes" for her paid publicity piece promoting the taping of yet another useless Hallmark Channel Kitten Bowl to air next year. Keep plugging away honey, this is all you got.

Then after Beth is finished with her taping of that useless Kitten Bowl, she crashes and burns since she was up and spinning for five days and that included a few late night appearances to get her camera fix, so she had to stay vertical for five days and not mess up that makeup and hair styling paid by the Hallmark Channel. She takes those obnoxious disturbing sleeping selfies that she has done many times in the past that only demented people do who have that sleeping fetish but what can you expect from a woman who dreamed of marrying Mel Gibson or Brad Pitt and got stuck with a morning zoo shock jock with a wig thicket that we all have to pretend looks good.

Beth posted this photo on her IG on 10-23-15 with her outstretched
arm taking another bizarre fake sleeping selfie but she was up and
ready for the Kimmel show taping.

Have a great day Beth Fans, stay tuned for much more to come...