Mission Impossible...

... which is someone who is trying to make Howard Stern look younger than 65 years old. He is desperate to look young for his last few episodes of "America's Got Talent" before his ass is sent back to a satellite where he is in shaky air space as we speak or read or whatever it is we are doing.

July 18, Southampton animal shelter event.
Beth flies solo and is reaching around
behind Jonathan McCann to pinch his butt.

After Beth O'Stern's last outing in the Hamptons where Howard was nowhere in sight and Beth was attaching her body to the men at a charity event on July 18 looking like she was trying to navigate choppy waters in stilettos, on July 24 Howard Stern shows up to escort his pariah wife to the movies and she cleverly chose to wear a giant circus tent to hide her ever falling ass and enormous cottage cheese thighs from all that pizza and wine she guzzles while rolling around on the floor with kitty cats and calling it charity work. The social pariahs found movie money at the bottom of their goldfish pond and trotted to see the latest debacle of Tom Cruise. I love Howard's huge pot belly and girl's bangs to hide the Botox swelling. 

The power bottom couple raced to see the new Mission Impossible movie labeled "straight to bomb" as we all have to put up with the aged and Botoxed Tom Cruise [yes, Crazy Days and Nights dot net said he keeps canisters of the stuff at home and injects himself constantly] with this tired movie serial based on the TV show except it has no resemblance to the original concept.  

Howard Stern sure has movie and popcorn money and can afford a date night with his inebriated wife but has no money for the peons working on his shell house in Florida who were working day and night remodeling the closets and installing cabinets and all that stuff. Yet, we think Howard is getting some use out of his basement cosmetic surgery center/wine tasting room at Stalag Beth in the Hamptons since Stern is freshly peeled and Botoxed like there is no tomorrow with tons of swelling across the forehead and between the eyes with a mini facelift to pull up his lower fug face. Yet, he needs a ton of lipo on that fat old man stomach area. Gotta stop the pizza and pot diet Howard! Am I right? Oh, I think I am more than right on quite a few topics on this blog site.

Howard's forehead is swollen from a ton of face fillers and his wife Princess Pariah can hardly move with that Botoxed upper lip. My gosh, give it up you two, you are not fooling anyone. Howard looks 65 and Beth looks 48.

Fall 2015 Rumer Willis will star in Chicago
on Broadway. Oh brother, thanks, but
no thanks. Let Broadway Baby
Howard Stern race to see it.

We love it that "Dancing With The Stars" was an audition tape for the deformed faced daughter of Demi Moore, you know, the celeb with the dead body at the bottom of her pool that no one noticed for days due to the rage parties at her house when she was MIA at some scientology cook out burning an effigy of Leah Remini. Demi did try and escape to the Temple of the Kabbalah and we are not sure this High School dropout turned the rumered Las Vegas call girl can ever be free of what is called her traumatized past. Oh yes, Rumer Willis will star as a transgender Roxie Hart. Please wear a giant girdle and tuck it, honey. Now that is some remake of the character from the classic stage play "Chicago". Hey go for it, I'm all for sexually vague rights.

Happy #SuperSaturdayMotherFuckers

Go fight ovarian cancer while hoarding genuine designer leather products at a discount price. Does it count if you don't have ovaries? Can you still go? Well, Beth normally shows up and Howard has been seen in the past at the event. He always parades around with Beth when he is under stress in his life. Like buying his wife a $100,000 Crocodile Hermes purse for her birthday and not paying his bills in Florida.