Gotta Laugh

Howard needs a break from appearing
in public to fix his face and erase those
liver spots.

Howard Stern pays a weekly visit to Stalag Beth in the Hamptons pretending to like kittens while his pariah wife is off screaming around the house at the help badgering them to turn on all 20 televisions to watch her fucking awful no-list show about cats on the Hallmark Channel on Sunday, which is just recycled kittens playing on a video loop that was originally shot in 2013 for airing in 2014 and 2015, both for the Kitten Bowl [football] and the Paw Bowl [whatever the heck it was called, with cats playing baseball] when her next kitten show should be headed for the toilet bowl.

7/12/15, headless Howard hides the tattoos and sits around to plug that kitten show on the Beth Hallmark Channel, a 112 Production gimmick to try and make Beth famous for the millionth time. Beth commonly posts photos of her headless husband since sources are saying this isn't him anyway.

We all saw Yoda Hoda and Kathie Lee on the millionth hour of The Today Show having to put up with Howard's dullard wife once again pushing kittens in our faces, while they gave the rarely vertical inebriated wife of Stern a test to see if she could guess the cartoon cats, I mean, who thought this up?

Slow-adult Beth O' Stern was tested on her knowledge of cartoon cats, this is not a joke, the woman has mental problems and believes she is Howard Stern's child bride instead of just having a stunted child's brain.

During her Yoda Hoda and Kathie Lee interview, Fibber MaGee contorted her face in all directions spouting what some would call lies, and said that America is upset that Howard Stern is being kicked off television as a judge on "America's Got Talent". We all wonder who this "America" person is, and why would they be upset that Howard is being kicked off TV?

Miss Botox is having a hard time making sense while on television even though her segment was pre-recorded she still managed to look like a prize dope, oh wait, was that on purpose? Those segment editors you know.

The self-important pest Bethie O'Nobody
shows up in a limo with her
photographer to document her routine
kitten dumping session so Beth
can pretend she's famous.

Beth documented her usual dumping of the kittens routine on poor fugs this past weekend, pigeons who get stuck with Beth's hand-me-down kittens while the Princess skates back to Stalag Beth to dig up more photo props from her basement filled with unfulfilled dreams and realized nightmares.

We are so happy to read a bunch of articles on Internet that George Clooney has found his Beth. Amal Clooney is moving her entire family [you know, ma, grandma, cousins, aunts, etc.] into all his properties and gossipers are saying that Clooney's Jewish and American friends can't stand Miss Palestine. The marriage was arranged by Amal's family, for what reason? Well she's rich and he needs financing for more of his crappy films and needs to buy more Academy awards and she wants what Beth wants, fame. Win-win situation. 

According to various gossip sites, nobody can stand Mrs. Clooney with the glued-on hair attached to her thinning scalp. Some claim the Mrs is a Mr. She claims to be a teacher at Columbia University when students are saying she waltzes in and out as a guest lecturer and demands to be treated like a princess. Some claim that her family arranged the marriage with Clooney to give them free access across borders and Amal wants to be famous. Oh, alright, I am sure Ms Thyroid can have anything it wants, while Clooney seems to be selling off property to pay the terms of the pre-nup; messy contract stuff that needs to be cleared up while Amal selects what palace she wants to live in and in what parts of the country that will get her the most press.

Mrs. Facelift, Nose Job and
Filler needs to stop
lying to her public of
desperate housewives.

George Clooney might be moving the entire Middle East settlement out of his properties on Lake Como and out of Cabo, with that side-by-side mansion he owns with his boyfriend Rande Gerber at that resort called Casamigos. Gerber, with his wife Miss Facelifted Cindy Crawford, Miss Plastic Surgery who sells shitty cosmetic products to the public while racing to her doctor 24/7 and claiming it's just moisturizer that makes her look 40 instead of 50 years old.

What happened to the social pariah on Social Life Magazine for her birthday? I thought hubby Howard always gave his over-aged cottage cheese thighs wife a magazine cover party around her birthday? No? Well, it was Kristin Chenowith who got the July 13 issue of Social Life magazine and a party in her honor [Beth's birthday is July 15, where is her cover party? You know, to cover up her real age].

So, how's that capital fundraising project for NSAL coming, Beth? Any progress?

#myhappylife #donothingwife #uselessfatbottomedfug

#saggythighs #lifeoflies

While Beth O pretends that lying around on fug factory cushions at Stalag Beth is charity work, Heidi Klum [with 3.17 million Twitter followers compared with Howard Stern's dismal 1.62 million followers], joined Taylor Swift on stage during her concert on July 10 to honor the USA Women's Soccer Team.

Keep those donations coming, folks, Beth has to support her entire family who have made Stalag Beth/Hamptons an Ostrosky encampment with tents, camels, servants, you name it, all supported on Howard Stern's thinning wallet [you thought I was going to say hair]. Ha, poor Beth, married, right? Hope you enjoy your thick carpeted girlfriends as Dame Beth-Man enjoys roasting Beth O.