Scarecrows

Beth O'Crows Feet suddenly has some new paid pigeons hired to liven up her stale Instagram site as Howard Stern actually thinks those stooges posting comments will somehow translate into a regular TV series for his aged pothead pariah [hey, it's a fact your head grows with pot or is it steroids or is it from being a giant egotistical idiot? Don't know, just guessing, no judgment].

No one posting on Beth's Instagram site has any clue who she is but they love to sit around with their munchies getting high watching fetish animal abuse videos while enjoying Beth's description of her kitty cat "nuggets" she pretends to foster when she just poses with them before dumping them onto real foster homes.

All that is on Miss Beth's feeble brain are nuggets since both she and Howard obsess about food since all that pot smoking makes them hungry...oh, allegedly, since Howard looks like he is fighting prostate cancer so it's probably medical marijuana while Beth is in charge of keeping the room humid so the plants will grow. Howard looks like he is turning female with breasts while trying to choke down something other than crow. 

Hey, Howard knows he is tanking the ratings for NBC's "America's Got Talent". Why do you think he does all that self hypnosis called, meditating. How many times have his doctors talked the giant drag queen off ledges in NY? Beth knows and thinks it's hilarious but she is stupid and thinks she is keeping all her properties post-Stern-mortem and that his family will not contest her pre nup and send her flying back to PA on her ass. 

Beth's family have staged a Hamptons home invasion and are there to stay as it is officially Team Beth making one last ditch effort to make Beth a star since she is desperate to ditch the rescue kitty cat farce.

Beth is perched on the beach as a scarecrow to frighten away all bird life so no more birds end up in Beth's belfry or anymore ducks get stuck in her chlorine filled swimming pool that she just ignored and deleted the photo of the duck from Instagram while her enormous head keeps growing from all the alleged pot smoking she does while telling her absentee stooge husband Howard that she is rescuing animals at 11:00 PM. Oh, right, that's why she was unavailable when he kept texting her from his private village this past Tuesday. We hope she's not falling back into old habits of cheating on Howard. Beth stated live on Howard's satellite radio show that she cheated on all her boyfriends and it was her habit to juggle boyfriends until she found Mr. Money who could support her habit of being a leech on society.

OMG, old lady brittle and sharp bones with sunken skin is so sexy. Beth thinks this photo makes her look skinny when young women do not have sunken skin. I love the new color of your wig, Bethie, as it looks like Howard is spending a lot of dough on your fathead thinking you actually have a future on television. Try and cover up and hide the crossed eyes and huge horse teeth, that bottom lip can barely cover those choppers installed by your rarely vertical and legal daddy.

My gosh, the spin that comes out of the Stern camp is just hysterical. Two aged scarecrows with the decrepit sunken skin that reveals their aged bones when their doctors tell them it's because they are so skinny! It's obvious they are trying to fit into the same size clothes.

Howard and Beth were in Cabo a few years ago with the Kimmels and some of Howard's hair transplants broke free in the wind and surf. This is why Howard is rarely outdoors for more than a few minutes at one time.

6-30-15

So, did Howard finally pay his scientology dues this year? We know they love Howard, and parade into his stale studio for one of his scripted Wikipedia interviews and rehashing old shit from years gone by. Howard is just giving them the interview script in advance, otherwise he ain't gettin' nobody coming in unless they know what the dope will talk about. Especially now, since Howard is treading water, his whole stale interview shtick has been a tired bit for over 15 years. Go ahead Howard, see if any fish will bite and give you a shot at another TV interview show. Good luck, you are putting people to sleep as it is, and we just love your menopausal celebs parading in as well as some that escaped embalming and are still in your green room waiting to be interviewed on a lost satellite.

Oops, forgot to submit my item to Beth for #ThrowbackThursday, well here it is. Remember when Miss Horninsky used to get front row seats during fashion week in New York until the designers figured out she was an aged nobody who was too fat for their clothes?

#FlashbackFriday