Torched

Howard is busy working on a sitcom that will never be aired unless he has about 100 million to finance it and grease a million palms to get it on TV or cable or wherever he thinks his shit will stick. A mole is circulating info in the gossip underground that Howard is pitching to play Joan Crawford in an updated version of "Torch Song" since he has the black face down pat, what with Miss Black Watch in the studio when African American celebs stop by for an overly long boring interview with old man Stern who loves to hear himself chatter, Howard feels safe again to do the black-face bit in his new sitcom. Beth can play a near-sighted pianist banging on the piano while taking selfies and stuffing kittens in her bra and scream that her purpose is to make herself famous.

Since Robin's alleged lap band explosion and bout with staged cancer, she has shrunk five inches and increased her bandwidth about 10 inches while cementing a stupid wig on that fat head. Miss Black Watch makes sure Howard does not resort to all his past racist humor on the radio, yes the original racist on the radio has had to clean up his act or be fired by Sirius satellite honchos.

And where is grinch face? The Leech that forgot to Bleach goes around with that giant knit hat to cover that football head of glued on hair extensions that are quite obvious up close and personal. We know Beth has no clothing budget anymore and is recycling her hideous clothes as we have seen that stupid hat before in a magazine for pet insurance. Yes, Corporate Model Bethie finally has a regular job bothering people and dumping cats onto foster homes while one of the richy residents of Long Island can snag a purebred pup to take home to Junior.




Beth first wore that hat when she had a dog before she fed it to death. That hat must be good and smelly by now, hope she threw the ugly thing in the wash before parading to NSAL on Thursday [2-5-15] but then it might have shrunk and not fit over her football head.

NOBODY BOUGHT THIS HOT MESS WITH THE FUG FACE

NOW PEOPLE WILL ONLY LOOK AT BETH IN HER UNDERWEAR WHEN A CAT IS IN THE PHOTO.

BETH WAS A CENTERFOLD REJECT.

Hey, Howard, what happened to your CNN deal? You know you wanted to skate into Piers Morgan's job when he got into trouble insulting a transgender guest on his show not once but two times and got fired; oh Howard could interview a transgender or himself, same thing and he would hardly insult himself and get fired.

No wonder Beth is obsessed with eyes and keeps posing with one-eyed kittens. She tries to focus her own crossed eyes resulting in a nervous spasm causing her right eye to close:

Hey, Howard, how about a TV show about how you documented on your radio show the painstaking process of purchasing a purebred bulldog? Maybe you could explain just how your wife lied her way into this book about RESCUE animals with their celebrity owners? Bianca was NOT a rescue, she was purchased from a breeder, as Howard and Beth have publicly talked about. Suddenly when Beth was actually shocked she was asked where she got Bianca from, was it from NSAL? Uh, no, however Beth the liar suddenly claimed Bianca was purchased from a "rescue breeder". And thanks to animal breeders, they are the ones contributing about 99 percent to the homeless animal population dumping rejects and unsold animals onto the county animal shelters. Oh yes, Beth made up a story to keep her salaried job with NSAL.

Bianca was not a rescue and Beth is not a celebrity. So how did she end up in this book "Rescue Tails: Portraits of Dogs and Their Celebrities" unless she lied through those giant choppers?

Hey, Howard, how about a show featuring all your interviews from your satellite radio show featuring a constant treadmill of D List celebs? You can steal that idea if you want, "Dead, Dying and D Listed: Stale Celebrity Interviews from the Howard Stern Radio Show".