Creative Lies

We all wonder what creative lies Howard's expert management spin team can come up with to keep the boring Howard Stern satellite radio show safely on the subscription based service where ratings don't exist since Stern can no longer hold an audience since the entire world has moved past morning zoo radio. But for some reason, Howard keeps obsessing about the opening song to his radio show, performed by Rob Zombie, that Howard has played for at least 60 seconds each morning for the past 16 years or so, because Howard gets a kickback when his scrambled voice is played on the air, then he can have Fred the sound man stop the record and proceed with bragging about his perfect life and how he married a model nobody has ever heard of.

Stern has always been
insanely jealous of RZ,
and that's why
Beth's fake age is
younger than SMZ's
fake age.

On Howard's Wednesday satellite talk radio show he had the new creative lie that he was in the studio with Rob Zombie creating the song "The Great American Nightmare", the opening song to Stern's radio show. Well, I guess Rob's story about the song is just all lies, that he wrote the song and arrangement with Charlie Clouser for Howard's [bomb] movie soundtrack. RZ claimed Howard insisted on being on the record. RZ disguised Stern's voice as best he could, and rumor has it, Stern barely made the final cut, that RZ taped his own voice over Stern's voice. RZ has publicly announced on more than one occasion, that the song was his biggest commercial failure.

About eight years ago or so, Howard publicly threatened RZ [in a backhanded way] saying he was replacing the opening song to his radio show; somehow it was voted down, and the original RZ opening number continues to be played to this day. The backstory is, Howard would have to pay someone CASH to either write a song for him, and/or insert Howard's voice on an existing song track, either way, pay, pay, pay, and Stern changed his mind, such as it is, as it slowly decays while he suffers nicotine fits at 2 AM and is desperate for those cigarettes he hides on the top of a book shelf in his Manhattan Hideaway from Beth.

Oh, now with RZ's Great American Nightmare haunted houses and tour, Howard is all riled up and suddenly Zombie is dancing on a stage at Stern's birthday show and airing highlights from his Great American Nightmare concert tour on Howard101. So, was this payola to Howard Stern for barely hearing the garbled voice of Stern on the record of his radio show theme song? It seems once you get stuck in the Howard Stern vortex, his giant vacuum of no talent sucks you in permanently having no way out. Ha, good luck to the producers of "America's Got Talent". Howard will never leave, you will never be free of the scripted dolt, you all have to cancel the show, quit, leave, play dead, or Stern will haunt you forever. 


Just ask RZ and David Letterman, oh, and Stern's stooge Vinnie Favale, the fatty who is in love with freak faced Bethie, and who hired a Beth look-a-like for his dismal amateurish musical stage play for morons who think the dead stand around and sing in the afterlife. Yes, he somehow got his financing for this stage play...payola for a past favor?

We see superstar Beth is back stuffing her fat ass into stretch pants as she gets to be photographed at a basketball game on 11/12/14. Howard is really having a hard time ditching her all of a sudden. She is done with those kittens and back in action with that upcoming book tour where a bunch of customers meandering around a book store wonder who the giant ass is sitting at a table surrounded by a thousand unsold books.

Howard has that section of frizzy bangs combed over his giant balding and pulled back facelifted hairline as Beth can hardly move her botoxed face gritting her teeth as she left half her wig in the Hamptons. Obviously, Beth and Howard can wear the same clothes, those outfits are interchangeable. Love the girly earrings on femme fatale Howard.

Poor Bethie took a backseat to the girls at the game, especially the super famous Taylor Swift, whose Scottish Fold cat has a huge modeling contract to promote tennis shoes while Beth & Yoda have nothing but a stupid kiddie book financed by the Stern Foundation. Love how Beth tries to copy those leggings worn by girls half her age.

Gee Whiz, Kim Kardashian announced there will be no xmas card this year after the family ran out of time organizing it. I wonder why? Can't be because of Brigitte Jenner.

Remember when Beth's super management team press released that she was starring OPPOSITE Amanda Peet in "Whipped"? Then everyone sat through that entire gawd awful film only to find Beth at the very end right before the credits kissing Brian Van Escort for two seconds. Wow, Beth, how could a self proclaimed globally famous model be subjected to a cameo with one line at the end of the film?

Desperate Beth tries to get
attention with putting a kitten
on her implants trying to be
sexy with her cadaver in a
bad wig fetish photos.

Pretty funny, Howard was embarrassed he got the press release wrong. He always hoped Beth would be launched into the limelight well before it became public that Stern bought her contract. He has been working to make her famous for 16 years and will never give up because the truly stupid and insane think that doing the same thing over and over will get a different result. Now we are down to kitten porn with Beth exposing herself in photos on Instagram with a cat in her bra, wow, pretty desperate, but the stupid won't stop, they just reach down and find more stupid at the bottom of the barrel.