Don't Beards & Babies go together? What's wrong with Beth, I mean, really wrong with Beth. We know Howard managed to produce three specimens of dubious origin but they exist nevertheless and Beth has nothing except claiming she is blissful at all times sans human babies. I guess the second the lovely angel got one pregnancy to go full term, she would tell all those little faux foster kittens to pack all their little cat toys and send them back to the North Shore Animal League.
We know a lot of beards have admitted to ordering up a few babies so they can have a happy and straight appearing union, but Howard refuses to give in and become famous off the heels of a little bundle of joy. Is it money? Well he is struggling with hanging onto two jobs and Beth is a panhandler, simply begging people for money for her own fund, her foundation Howard's lawyers set up to cash in on the cinders of their dead dog Bianca, called Bianca's Furry Friends, and now we are suffering through their new commercial project, a phony rescued purebred Persian cat named Yoda.
Beth doesn't even get any birthday parties anymore since Howard Stern can no longer get Hamptons Magazine to sponsor them. Howard used to get Beth a cover in July, her birthday month, but that is now only a memory. |
Famous Kim Kardashian had her birthday party again sponsored by Tao Nightclub in Las Vegas on October 25, 2014. Kim is still in demand while Beth is getting doors slammed in her face since about 2011. Oh, but Kim is married now with a baby, hmmm, wonder if that makes a difference. |
Okay, Beth, stop reading now and go take another sleepy selfie. We don't want you trying this at home:
Beth loves the new publicist duo team of Mark Mullet and Keith Bloomfield since they had to come in to rescue Beth and get her some store opening appearances and her book deals.
This Beth broad is cat-shit crazy, and loves to play the victim in every way. My friend Jeanette saw her at a Liam Neeson movie premiere in NYC or the Hamptons. She went up to Beth and asked "Sorry to interrupt you from the beautiful soup and color me high on wine but what happened to your cool Ray Bans you had on before?"
ReplyDeleteBeth replied "I guess you could say one of the kitten haters stole them and donated to themself. They're probably getting $600 for them on EBAY as we speak??"
To which Jeanette replied "Oh...so...they're around??"
Just to cap off thAAt lAast story. After the movie premiere Jeanette told me Beth tred to hold court as if SHE was in the actual film. People were just rolling their eyes as she screamed on in that 14 yr old baby voice.
ReplyDeleteTHEN had the audacity to make a grand announcement (and tweeted) "Howard and I are GOING to be live tweeting THE BACHELOR (Juan Pablo) as soon as I GET HOME?!?!?" She put this pompous emphasis on the word "GOING" as if everyone was hanging on her every word waiting, salivating on twitter.