The Last Marriage

Julia Lemigova & Martina

Headed down that road is Martina Navratilova since she proposed to her S&M girlfriend who I think will be the last one to be with Martina. I don't think Martina will just be able to pay this one to go away when she tires of her, I think this last union is her "forever" union.

Robin & Susan

Everyone knew the Robin Williams marriage to Susan would be his last one. The old Susan Schneider was not the type Williams was dating during and after the breakup of marriage number two. Many Internet sites like Crazy Days and Nights dot net, were reporting that Williams was dating a girl half his age and was hosting coke drenched parties but he could no longer score a young girl at his age and negative bank balance. So, suddenly Lurch Susan shows up and we knew that would end everything. Yes, Robin found his Beth, and his forever mate.

Lavender Beth chooses
kittens over human babies

Just like with the real Beth, the old nobody Beth Ostrosky was not the ideal woman Stern had envisioned for himself. He tried to get famous models like Angie Everhart [she wanted Howard to fund her TV career in Hollywood] and Kylie Bax [someone Howard never dated], only to end up with the 30 year old butch and bossy Beth O. No one thinks Howard will get a chance at a third marriage as Big Bethie would only let that happen over Howard's dead body, and we know these old farts love the S&M; any perversion to get them off since they all go both ways.

According to numerous Internet sites reporting about Martina's soon to be bride Julia, Martina needs to tread carefully. But I think she is too old to be moving on from this one and think she has found her end mate, game, set and match, whatever, hope she is happy in her last marriage.

Julia picture here with an unnamed man. Julia Lemigova is the Marquis Julia de la Turner.

Surprisingly, Joan Rivers never married again after the sudden suicide of her husband. If anyone caught Joan's episode of that awesome show "Celebrity Ghost Stories" you saw that Joan bought the entire top floor of an old mansion that was converted to individual apartments. Joan claims the place is haunted by the former owner of the entire building [who was a niece of JP Morgan] who died in the penthouse apartment that Joan bought. Now, Joan can converse with her ghost one-on-one instead of through a veil of cold breezes and lights going on and off or via a presence in her bedroom at 3 AM. I hope they enjoy each others company as they can now both live together in the haunted mansion.

Madam President is finally off the Board

I hope we get Howard to retell the story this week of when he was a guest at Joan's haunted penthouse apartment years ago. It had to be around xmas and he was invited over for drinks. He stated how uncomfortable he was in the posh penthouse as Joan is extremely formal and it was a formal gathering. As guests made their way into the dining room, Stern made his exit. I do not recall if anyone was with Stern, but as usual his stories are boring with no ending and they just trail off into nothing.

Be careful what you say about the recently departed; you may be meeting them sooner than you think.

You might also be careful about your finances, as you don't know when you will be forced to host a crappy game show after being fired from your main gig.

It was press released last year that Ferguson was to host "Celebrity Name Game" [brought to you by that lavender couple Arquette/Cox] and it is supposed to be debuting this Fall along with a half-hour afternoon talk show. Wow, just like Howard Stern, gotta work those two jobs to make up for pay cuts, job losses, so forth, so the two jobs almost equal that once big paycheck.