The great and powerful and beautiful Cher was bestowed with the Kennedy Center Honors award December 1 which is an annual gala event for those in the performing arts for their contributions to American culture regardless of their citizenship. Howard Stern of course has not been able to horn in on this event and receive this recognition since he has contributed nothing to American culture other than grease paint and monkey brains and his citizenship has been transferred to the dog star.
Add Cher to the list of people who have received this honor that Howard Stern is super jealous of like Johnny Carson who received the honor in 1993 and David Letterman who received the honor in 2012. There were talks in the Oval Office that Stuttering John Melendez will receive the honor before Howard Stern does or when hell freezes over, but of course, Howard would just need to make a major monetary contribution to American culture by paying all of us for having to look at him and having that gypsy, tramp and thief he married pushed into our faces ad nauseam along with making a major monetary contribution to the Democratic party and not just paying lame lip service to Madame General Hillary who has never consented to appearing on the Howard Stern stale satellite radio show and I doubt she ever will since that would mean her next step would be death's door with Howard being the doorman at Reaper Radio.
Beth Stern had her annual boring event last Friday where the North Shore Animal League pays her to be their useless spokesperson and Howard Stern sponsors the annual big dinner party in honor of his useless wife who does almost zilch to help the plight of homeless animals other than pose with them and post selfies ad nauseam on her Instagram show. Beth tried to be Cher on Friday and you can see she failed as Cher would never be seen in that giant midnight mass church dress but Beth has a huge lower body and has to hide her tree trunk legs from plain sight. Howard recycled his clown suit he wore on the red carpet from his stint on "America's Got Talent" and Beth recycled her clown wig. Both must be a musty smelly mess by now. Ask Meghan Markle. She'll stick an air freshener on Howard & Beth.
Speaking of witches, reports out of Kensington Palace are saying that wife-elect Meghan Markle Sparkle is one royal pain and is bossing everyone around acting like she is the Queen in waiting when everyone is waiting to see what a woman who claimed she couldn't have children will eventually give birth to. Markle is alienating Duchess Kate who everyone is saying really wanted to marry Dirty Harry and not William the Conqueror. Some people go as far as saying Kate's kids were fathered by Harry but I think that might be a bridge too far. We love it when giant nobodies marry their wealthiest client, customer, uh, I mean, boyfriend and then act like they own the place and demand to be treated like royalty. Oh wait, she is royalty unlike Bethie. But it's been reported that Meghan wanted to stick air fresheners in that church she was married in and at Windsor Castle which was met with a giant no.
Everyone is talking about the comparison with Beth O'Nobody but Meghan's meal ticket is off the charts, I mean, no American commoner can compete with that, not even Beth even though her big cheese of the Hamptons buys her a Social Life magazine cover feature every year, wow. I bet Meghan enjoyed those little mailers from Beth with a Beth Calendar stuffed inside with a note asking if Harry has any other brothers who are single [hey, doesn't hurt to ask].
So hilarious since Howard Stern keeps inserting little quips on his rarely live stale satellite radio show how he and Beth don't want to travel and like staying home when sources are reporting that they have metal body parts now and go off like a siren and have a full body scan where all the security guards would get a look at what is under Beth and Howard's clothes and believe me, you wouldn't want to see it. Beth has to travel with a doctor's note and sit in the First Class lounge and be escorted on board to avoid embarrassment. Howard refuses to fly commercial airlines. So Howard would have to pay for their own private plane service to get anywhere since SiriusXM only pays for travel expenses and limo service when it is directly related to Sirius business and Sirius is trying to be free from Stern so nothing is Sirius related unless Howard wants to take their retirement classes and needs a ride. Unless there is a kitten to be saved in Italy or Paris, Beth is essentially grounded to U.S. travel or close to it and those jaunts to L.A. are paid by NSAL or the Hallmark Channel aside from her cosmetic surgery appts in Florida every three months or so.
Well, it's that time of year when the Sterns haul out their fugly xmas tree with their resident cats that keep dying at the hands of the on-call Stern pigeon vet Dr. Jackie, the paid grim reaper who has to kill Beth's pets on demand since Beth has theater tickets or an appt in the city to get her wig dyed and crash a morning TV show and has to have the host bring up her pet who just happened to die and Beth can fight back fake tears saying how brave she is for showing up to a TV show that didn't want to donate any airtime in the first place to Beth's charity gimmicks and stunts.
Everyone is talking about the comparison with Beth O'Nobody but Meghan's meal ticket is off the charts, I mean, no American commoner can compete with that, not even Beth even though her big cheese of the Hamptons buys her a Social Life magazine cover feature every year, wow. I bet Meghan enjoyed those little mailers from Beth with a Beth Calendar stuffed inside with a note asking if Harry has any other brothers who are single [hey, doesn't hurt to ask].
So hilarious since Howard Stern keeps inserting little quips on his rarely live stale satellite radio show how he and Beth don't want to travel and like staying home when sources are reporting that they have metal body parts now and go off like a siren and have a full body scan where all the security guards would get a look at what is under Beth and Howard's clothes and believe me, you wouldn't want to see it. Beth has to travel with a doctor's note and sit in the First Class lounge and be escorted on board to avoid embarrassment. Howard refuses to fly commercial airlines. So Howard would have to pay for their own private plane service to get anywhere since SiriusXM only pays for travel expenses and limo service when it is directly related to Sirius business and Sirius is trying to be free from Stern so nothing is Sirius related unless Howard wants to take their retirement classes and needs a ride. Unless there is a kitten to be saved in Italy or Paris, Beth is essentially grounded to U.S. travel or close to it and those jaunts to L.A. are paid by NSAL or the Hallmark Channel aside from her cosmetic surgery appts in Florida every three months or so.
Well, it's that time of year when the Sterns haul out their fugly xmas tree with their resident cats that keep dying at the hands of the on-call Stern pigeon vet Dr. Jackie, the paid grim reaper who has to kill Beth's pets on demand since Beth has theater tickets or an appt in the city to get her wig dyed and crash a morning TV show and has to have the host bring up her pet who just happened to die and Beth can fight back fake tears saying how brave she is for showing up to a TV show that didn't want to donate any airtime in the first place to Beth's charity gimmicks and stunts.
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| Beth wheels out this same ugly tree every year from the hall closet with the same decorations with Charlie Chunk long gone from the Stern Hamptons hostel. |
#beth #bethostern #kennedy #kennedycenterhonors
#kennedycenterhateshoward #christmas #giftgrab
#charitycashgrab #nsal #meghan #harry #william
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