No Palate for Paltrow

Howard Stern sharpened his ass-kissing tongue on the pointy ass of the self-proclaimed raw vegan turned vegetarian turned phony baloney Gwyneth Paltrow, on his over cooked rarely live soggy satelite radio show on Wednesday, dishing up a Paltrow leftover that is a rerun of a rerun whenever the veggie snob dishes on the dirt in her past life, it's always a rehashed rerun as she avoids the truth about her rise to fame hanging on the Weinstein wagon.

No, she will not admit that sources have alleged that she was the FAVORITE of the Weinstein brothers and the real reason for the Brad Pitt breakup was due to her fooling around constantly, oh yeah, and for some reason, Gwnyeth doesn't eat meat as in allegedly refused to give Brad oral but hey, he ain't gettin' her any Academy Awards. It seems she was not a vegetarian when she was working for the Oscar Weinersteins.

As is common knowledge, Gwyneth has been linked in the past with Jerry Seinfeld the $cientology major, but we know he married Miss Butch who loves Gwen. Hey, I don't care, this means nothing to me, I just love the phonies in Hollywood who feed the tabloids with bullshit and the public believes their stories and fawns over these celebs. Howard fawns over them too since he is soooo desperate for fame and attention he can hardly stand it, what with begging celebs to stay at his foster cat-funded mansions so he can get a charitable tax benefit while those celebs are pressured into giving Beth Stern cash [via her foundation] as they exit through the gift shop.

Everyone is laughing at Princess Eunice Paltrow who has come down a few notches on her bedpost to have to consent to do Stern interviews in the first place. She got Stuck With Stern what with everyone laughing about it as her kids are rumored to be very special [hint, hint] and need experts to deal with them due to malnutrition that kills off the few brain cells they were born with. Did Howard Stern bring up in his interview with Gwyneth this week that sources are alleging she originally found her hen-pecked partner flying around the chicken coop at a celebrity centre looking for his hair as we wonder if she doesn't eat meat after all.

Eunice's former and future husbands had a fun little meetup but they are all in the same science club, right?

Beth only shows a tiny bit of the Florida feline foster
room stocked with freebies from HomeGoods while the
rest of the near-empty house is off limits to cameras
save for the foyer, patio, and bushes.

The Stern satellite radio show could not be more dull as Howard has resorted to kissing celebrity D-List asses like there is no tomorrow, but hey, the old fart on the radio has to dance for the Sirius Nancy Boys or he will find a few of his real estate properties up on the auction block.

So when is Beth being shipped outta town and to her botoxology lobotomy lab in Florida? Well, we are not sure if the Buttinskys can score any real invites to the big summer kick-off for Hamptons magazine this weekend or if they will run and hide at their Florida flophouse pretending they meant to be there in the first place as we wait and see what idiot no-lister they can photograph outdoors since the place is empty except for a few pieces of cheap furniture in the foyer and a cat room off the master bedroom suite no one has seen. Are the Sterns sleeping in sleeping bags in that place? Ha, that Florida Mystery House is haunted by dough they no longer have since they bought it with money from Howard's settlement scheme with Sirius and their contract w/NBC. So Howard got his 4 year deal on "America's Got Talent" (AGT) and not much else. He was never discovered as having any talent and was sent back to that burnt out satellite dish trying to stay afloat with pre-recorded interviews and stale skits. I guess Sirius needs a giant Stern sinkhole to claim tax losses each quarter to balance out any expenses and profits.

So funny that Howard can't stand that AGT is premiering their 13th season on May 29 with Howard's episode of that decrepit loser David Letterman's new Netflix show airing on May 31. Wow, can't wait for that Hollywood STAR to appear on Letterman, the ratings killer himself that has to appear on subscription based services or he will tank the broadcast since free network TV has actual viewer ratings that can be counted, not this pay service bullshit that Letterman had to go to as well as Howard. Reports about Lettermans' Netflix show have been hilarious, boring doesn't describe it. One reviewer said he fell asleep during the Obama episode and Clooney rattled on about that fug bucky beaver he married so audiences are expecting the same from Stern. 

But, Stern wanted his episode to air the same week as the premiere of AGT and that's what he got in an attempt to somehow prove he is as famous and relevant as Simon Cowell as his hit summer show with NBC has the producers so thrilled with having Simon as the top judge that they ordered special winter episodes too as already reported by this blogger.

Howard actually thinks his stupid boring Letterman interview on Leftflix can compete with the superstar summer show AGT airing the same week. AGT is airing May 29 and Stern on Netflix airs May 31 because Howard is having a huge meltdown over Simon Cowell's big AGT premiere episode for this summer. We know Netflix has no ratings so Howard is safe from embarrassment. In a brief clip available online, Leftflix makes sure Howard Stern trashes the President in another rehashed old story we've heard a million times before about The Don. Geez, all Stern can do is painstakingly drag out the boring old story of The Don rating celebrities on their looks. Yawn. OH, The Don thought his daughter was a 10 and Angelina a 7. WOW what huge news Howard if I were an idiot. Big deal, who cares. No one, but Howard has to trash Trump or no appearing on Leftflix. What a pitiful old creep Howard Stern has become since evolving from a pitiful young creep.

Typical AGT audience:

Typical Letterman/Stern audience:

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