Door Matt

Great news that Matt Lauer was shown the door and all the locks were changed with security banning the alleged sexual harasser from the building at NBC according to news sources across the Internet. But I will miss his annual cross-dressing for Halloween show that he does, I mean, Howard loves that too, right? Aren't they public cross-dressers? Yep.

You know, Beth is normally the one removed from The Today Show and has security escort her out since no one can get her to leave when she has her stupid appearances dragging animals with her and plugging her useless life of taking cell phone pictures of cats and calling it charity work.

Now maybe Howard Stern can stop badgering his psychiatrist with that endless question of WHY DID MATT GET THE BIG HOSTING JOB ON THE TODAY SHOW AND NOT ME???...and it can finally be put to rest. Howard's jealousy of Matt knows no bounds. I tried counting how many times that website that has a daily summary of the Stern Show at MarksFriggin.com, caught Howard informing his listener through the years that Matt Lauer was a LANDSCAPER right before landing that big job on The Today Show. My rough tally was 50,000 times Howard said Matt was a landscaper before getting the job of host of The Today Show. Howard has been jealous of Lauer forever, even though Lauer was stuck doing an opening sequence to one of Howard's many loser unaired TV pilots, Matt went on to TV fame while Howard's ass was nailed to a radio dial.

So Howard must feel pretty good by now since Matt Lauer got fired by NBC with Howard feeling smug on that dull satellite holding down that recliner parked in front of his computer screens for about 12 hrs per week, counting down the days when he can finally afford to retire and be stuck with his idiot wife forever in the Hamptons cesspool of medical waste washing up on the shoreline.

But hey now, will Howard help his buddy out? I hear there is an on-air co-hosting job that was vacated by Artie Lange that needs filling, or how about that week-long announcing job recently vacated by George Takei? Matt would be the perfect doormat for Howard Stern. Howard would have a big orgasm if Matt would sit there inside Howard's satellite radio studio as a sidekick to kick around and concoct on-air scripted bits and skits involving naked gay men, right Howard? Like how you did with George Takei with on-air BITS scripted for your stale satellite radio show? Won't it be fun, Howard, to see Matt appear in drag on Howard-360 while you humiliate him in a BIT scripted for the air then later claim you had no idea it was a bit but asked simple, honest questions to get him fired? 

Matt Lauer cut it pretty close since we think he was slated to show up again to Beth's bullshit awards gala honoring herself for hijacking funds that are donated to the charity where she works as their useless spokesperson, the North Shore Animal League (NSAL). As already reported by this blogger, that annual gala honoring Beth is December 1 this year, so we think Matt will be in hiding with his lawyers and will ditch the event.

Oh, but wait, not so fast. I think we know what's next for Matt since he is hitting skid row and will need help from Howard for publicity - enter the "Real Housewife of Instagram" show! Another celebrity loser posing with a phony foster cat is the theme of Beth's IG show.

Beth posted a hilarious photo on her IG show of the breaking ground ceremony at NSAL with two 90 year old hobbits that look like they couldn't break wind on a stormy day let alone break ground at NSAL for the much publicized Bianca's Furry Friends (BFF) Feline Adoption Center. You know, that capital project that Beth has been collecting dough for since 2013 that will have her foundation's name on it [BFF] yet is funded by everyone but her and Howard Stern. I think I won't hold my breath with this dumbo project management team with Beth the slow adult in charge of its publicity since she does nothing else. So, will Beth announce at her NSAL Beth Awards show this Friday, the exact dollar amount she and Howard donated to have their foundation's name on this new cat adoption center? Can't wait for that.

Big news coming from Dawgshed.com, we found Howard's fan but he has decided to cancel the Stern channels. Poor Howard, he got his hopes up that his fan would stick around a bit longer. 

Broadway opening night 11-29-17.

So where were the pariah twins on Wednesday night [11/29]? They weren't hogging a red carpet crowding into another one of Steve Martin's insufferable bombs on Broadway? You might remember his first debacle called "Bright Star" where the Horninskys were front and center and Howard welcomed Steve to the end of his career when he interviewed him for reaper radio last year. [Ref: BFP 3-25-16 Red Carpet, I hear you calling...; 5-14-16, Touch Down; 5-17-16 Got a quarter?].

Martin's new play "Meteor Shower" is getting lukewarm reviews for a 75 minute play with the best seats going for $350 each. The show seems like a skit from Saturday Night Live with Amy Schumer appearing in a not so challenging role that anyone could do and the entire story leaves audiences wondering what the heck it was about and what the point was. Well, you've got that overrated Steve Martin writing it when the banjo playing doofus never should have gone beyond his stint as a writer for the Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour. But again, where were Martins' BFFs Howard and Beth Stern? Gee, I thought Howard would be right there with the freebie tix but maybe Martin couldn't afford to give any tickets away since his first play closed down due to lack of sales shortly after the Tony Award broadcast where it received a few nominations and lost.

#mattlauerisshrimponthebarbi

#byebyematt   #howardstern

#bethostroskystern  #nsal
#meteorshower  #stevemartin
#amyschumer