Bounty Hunter

Word on the street is that there is a bounty on Howard Stern's frizzy weaved perm because the guy's been bumping into walls and can't keep his stories straight and can barely show up as scheduled to read all of his product placement ads while slowly killing his listener with boredom on his talk radio channels with Howard 100 and 101 providing nonstop boredom until that listener can't take it anymore and may literally drop dead from boredom and then where would Howard be? Gosh, he would have to bump up those product placement ads since his channels would be funding nothing for SiriusXM if that one subscriber would suddenly die and can't pay that monthly sub anymore. DBM heard gossip that the late songwriter/singer Chris Cornell was listening to the Stern satellite radio show replay and took out a rope and hung himself because his family had said he had been distraught recently about whether Howard Stern is truly a Dunkin' Donuts coffee guy or if he will switch back to Starbucks coffee unexpectedly. 

Poor Howard's stuck on that radio dial since he's got a contract and he needs an old fart doctor's note if he wants any more unscheduled days off as he fights for support from Sirius who just has to mandate another guy with the company pay a visit to the struggling Stern radio show. Allegedly Jamie Foxx is tagged to appear who is a low ranking science club member since Howard's having a hard time getting any guests into his stale radio show and Sirius is going to Stick 'Em With Stern. Foxx is hosting a new game show on Fox TV and Howard is desperate to get a gig like that but he's an aged unlikable moron with the personality of a drunk old fart at the senile group home.

The famous Funeral Buttinsky's Howard and Beth Stern have been on buttinsky standby and had hoped to crash the Brad Grey funeral and now the Cornell funeral but both are private affairs. They count funerals as gigs and plug them into their resumes when hounding other people to fund their TV project ideas. 

On Monday's stale satellite radio show we got Episode 5 of the new bit on the radio show called "Howard's Boob" [ref: BFP April 3, 2017, "Season 1, Episode 3: "Howard's Boob" and May 4, 2017, "Keeping Up With the Sterns"].

Howard hopes his show will be picked up by Andy Cohen as part of his Real Housewives franchise with Howard trying to sell his idea for Beth as "The Real Housewife of Instagram". Howard tries to claim he is just talking about his life with Beth yet each episode always contains a plug for Beth and/or her charity since he wants his listener to believe that unmarketable nobody he married is all into being a big charity worker when she's just desperate to get some airtime any way she can and is an unemployable pariah. There seems to be nothing on the horizon for the selfie monster except her annual shilling for a bogus animal charity that has the nerve to come up with a Hero Dog Awards show to pretend they do anything for humans or animals, the American Humane Association (AHA), that sits back and watches animals being abused on TV and movie sets with many ending up dead and discarded with the AHA reps doing zero, a fact that is found in various reports available on the Internet. Oh, Beth doesn't care, the AHA gets her face on TV since that is what she wants and nothing else.

Here's the updated episode list of "Howard's Boob" for Season 1 which began January 2017:

Episode 1, "Beth Shouts Suri"
Air date: January 18, 2017

Episode 2, "Beth Bumbles Buttons"
Air date: January 24, 2017

Episode 3, "Beth Banishes Laughter"
Air date: April 3, 2017

Episode 4, "Beth Don't Play That"
Air date: May 3, 2017

New Episode 5, "Beth Touts Texting Silence"
Air date: May 22, 2017

Episode 5 was merely to plug Beth that she is on a super important mission at a veterinarian's office since we know she has her own cats [kept locked in a room on the second floor of her Hamptons hellhole and only let out for meals and photo ops] and a foster room of cats in cages funded by her foundation and the North Shore Animal League (NSAL). When Beth tires of the foster cat photo props, she stages a big dumping session and uploads the photos on her stale Instagram site. 

So Howard related that they were taking a walk sometime and Beth was texting while Howard was singing a Soundgarden song and Beth got miffed. Gary was tasked with trying to get Beth on the phone again to talk about it [zzzzzzzzzzzzz; this is so dull I can hardly type about it] but Princess was busy at the vet's office. I know, boring, but they don't live together so they've got to come up with some sort of friction since constant banter about how in love they are will turn people off. It gives his poor inebriated fan hope that Howard will lose Beth O and be divorced and dejected once again but Stern can't afford to play that role again. So don't hold your breath. Howard is writing this shit himself and it shows and he wonders why he keeps getting kicked off TV and has dozens of unaired pilot TV shows.

Gosh, who's this showing her famous gams? Oh, just Heidi Klum walking the runway for Fashion for Relief during the 70th annual Cannes Film Festival on May 21, 2017 in Cannes, France. This year's fashion show raised funds for "Save the Children" charitable organization to help victims of the Syrian conflict.

Fashion for Relief was launched by supermodel Naomi Campbell to
help victims of natural disasters around the globe.
We hear that Beth is an unnatural disaster and her
Hamptons neighbors are seeking aid from the organization.

Don't miss Jamey Jasta from Hatebreed and his awesome interview with the great Rob Zombie. Oh yeah, the independent podcasts are hitting it out of the park with their interviews that are solid, interesting, detailed, with the guest revealing stuff they never talked about before. Get off a satellite and head over to the Jasta Podcast with the top people who never or rarely do interviews but they do it for Jasta.

Episode 249 - Rob Zombie

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#bethostroskysterndoesnothingallday
#bountyhunter    #fashonforrelief
#robzombie