Selfie Gratification

I couldn't have said it better, a few people posted comments to an article last year when Beth Stern, with Howard's long time old lady buddy Lois Pope [the mafia widow of the founder of The National Enquirer], staged a huge animal pickup in Florida, just where the Sterns happen to have a mansion and need to set up a charity gimmick from that location with Beth's trips paid by her charity that employs her as their chief fundraiser and useless spokesperson, the North Shore Animal League. 

Beth is also in league with Lois Pope's pet animal charities including the American Humane Association (AHA) that is funded by the Screen Actors Guild, where studios buy a statement that is printed at the end of movies and TV shows featuring live animals that they weren't harmed while being carted off the back lot in carcass bags or dumped back onto the county animal shelter system. Yes, AHA was concocted by the entertainment industry so the viewers of various shows will feel good that no animals were harmed during production as they hope no one checks out the Internet and PETA to read about what really goes on behind the scenes with some productions using live animals that are found dead in cages without food or water and some horses dropped dead on the set that were a part of HBO's show "Luck" when few of the horses were lucky getting stuck in that loser production.

Having trouble, Beth, with getting sponsors for your Florida Cat Rescue and Career Recovery Center?

Yes, I liked these comments and it explains this new thing for self-proclaimed millionaires to have to scrounge around for a bit of tax relief and doing almost 0.0 with helping the plight of the thousands of animals at county shelters waiting in line for the gas chamber. Beth and her friend Lois, have to ferret out animals from other states, fly them into Florida and then Beth takes a few home to Stalag Beth in the Hamptons for about 10 days for her frenzied selfies featuring the cats forced to pose in weird positions on her various freakish body parts with Howard Stern thrown in just in case you forget Beth is married to the aged shock jock who is still on the radio doing his same dull job and never being able to break out of the grind and actually become a famous late night talk show host, a dream that has eluded him for 62 years.

What the fuck is this supposed to be? Howard staged a slumming session at Crazy Town with a gash on his face and deep nose job marks that have sagged into his mouth lines, weird eyeglass shadows around his eyes with the glasses stuck on his forehead showing off that lasered eye area to look young on the radio yet be camera ready in case his ship of fate sails towards those garbage filled shores of the Hamptons. Video streaming of Howard's radio show is in the planning stages and will be all set to go anywhere from 5 to 112 years from now.

Mega star wives Catherine and Julie wish they
could have sat in a phony soundstage in NY and bully
kittens into playing with cat toys for the loser
Hallmark Channel, and have the kittens terrorized
by puppies during Half-Time.

While Howard was hiding from being ignored by the SiriusXM stars who were broadcasting from the Super Bowl in California, the real jet setter elite were already there having a good time living in the top 10 percent of the pyramid of wealth with Howard having to stress out about where his next radio monologue is coming from in between reading tons of commercials on his show to fund it since it's a loser commodity right now for the satellite company relying on the new car market and the NFL, NASCAR and other major contracts to keep the satellites airborne. Yep, the mega A-Listers were at the Super Bowl sans the loser Sterninskys with their sad little social media site plugs for that no-lister Kitten Bowl on the Beth Stern Hallmark Channel. Now Howard can sit and stew during his absence from his rarely live satellite radio show and write a witty monologue about how only losers care about the Super Bowl and Beth yelling at kittens is A List stuff dreams are made of. 

So, what are other people saying about Howard Stern? Well, someone seems to have guessed the reason behind Howard's multi-million dollar lawsuit against his employer. Wasn't the real reason behind Howard filing that bullshit lawsuit against the Sirius corporation was to try and prove breach of contract? Then Howard would be free to go off on his own taking his listener with him, and the lawsuit settlement might have included all that money Howard owes for Sirius buying his catalog of radio shows and building that giant stupid custom studio with video cameras and a stage so old rockers could lip sync to their latest boring album. How complicated, but it failed and the judge in the case threw Stern's lawsuit in the garbage. Oh well, it seems Howard is stuck with the company for at least another 12 years before he can market his own shit unless he wants to buy out his contract or he has the option of retiring to that selfie prison camp with Miss Rarely Vertical and be done with fighting for fame. In any case, he is owned for 12 more years, at least that is what we read, that Sirius bought Stern's catalog of show tapes for what, two million dollars, and it might revert to Stern in 2028 when they will be worth about $12.00 to his surviving heirs. Fun stuff, we can't wait.

Yes, we know, Howard's career took a nosedive with the divorce from wife #1. It was widely reported his terrestrial radio show ratings dropped and he never recovered with his national syndication deals ultimately being canceled with only a few markets remaining before he had to go to a pay service with limited listeners and no ratings. I might cry.

In real celebrity news, it seems marrying into the Ruling Class agrees with Nicky Hilton. I guess marrying into a family worth, oh, about 500 trillion dollars would do something for a girl's complexion and make those eyes sparkle. Of course we read that Mrs. Rothschild is expecting her first child with her boyish looking husband whose father allegedly committed suicide. Such are the perils of marrying into such a high pressure world of sitting on the top of a pyramid of wealth. Well, looks aren't everything you know, I mean, yes, Nicky's pretty and what Rothschild wouldn't want a pretty wife? But, Dear Nicky is hardly in Beth's league. The league of extraordinary gentlemen...?