The Firing Squad

Howard filmed a special segment for AGT
in honor of him finally leaving the show.

On Tuesday's stale satellite radio show, we learned that the NBC summer filler show, America's Got Talent (AGT) is giving Howard Stern a special segment to thank Howard for quitting the show. Everyone knows the real story, that producers have been struggling with how to dump the old man since he was tanking their ratings since 2012. Producers thought hiring Mel B and Heidi Klum as judges would help the ratings but since most of the viewers don't like girls, they failed to boost ratings. Yes, good ol' Howard is sticking to his story, that he is actually quitting the show instead of NBC moving the show back to Los Angeles with or without Howard Stern. So another take it or leave it type of proposition since that is the only way to be free of Howard and his pariah wife Beth, is to pretend it was their decision all along. Fired much, Howard? Oh right, you quit before the press release that you were being replaced for season 11 or you would have thrown a girlie fit.

After the Sterns paraded around in
front of  their paid photogs in Cabo a
few years ago, Jennifer Aniston put
up a giant sheet to stop the Sterns
from showing off their aged bodies
and fake hair and getting their braggin'
photos printed in the tabloids
since Jen is embarrassed that she
can't get rid of the hangers-on
staying at the resort.

Howard and Beth Nobody are too famous for summer filler TV, what with Beth shilling for the charity that pays her a salary, the North Shore Animal League (NSAL) and her constant promotion of shitty animal rescue crap merchandise to line Beth's pockets and to pretend she is raising money for her personal foundation, Bianca's Furry Friends (BFF) to build a kitten center at NSAL. What kitten center, Beth? Oh, but then that might stop Beth's super Instagram account filled with phony foster kittens, the ones that are snatched from local municipal shelters before they can be adopted by anyone but Princess Beth in her bid for selfie fame and fortune. Well, the dolts out there who buy crappy useless "animal rescue" jewelry promoted by Beth along with her stupid books, are just lining the pockets of the self-proclaimed media moguls so they can buy more real estate since that is all Howard Stern seems to be doing with his money that he is getting from the stupid public along with his bread and butter salary from the corporate cloud called SiriusXM radio.

Ellen was afraid she would be "outed" as a lesbian
before she was ready. Who knew she was a comic.
Howard loves Ellen because she allowed
Beth to trot onto her show to brag about her selfie
career of doing nothing but sticking her flabby ass in
her photos to turn on the aged lesbian audience.

So what is it with Howard now? Loving the gay/transgender community is okay by me, I have no problem with that, it's phony baloney Howard Stern that I have a problem with as he kisses Ellen DeGeneres' ass on Tuesday's radio show. It's common knowledge Martha Stewart [another good friend of the Sterns] is bi-sexual and rumored to have had an affair with Ellen DeGeneres, did Howard bring that up on Tuesday's stale satellite radio show? Howard just loves Ellen since she let his dolt wife on her show a few years back to promote herself and about how she is a tireless selfie worker with the cats stuck in her photos to pretend she is a nice person. Ellen? Oh, difficult to work with, and has had numerous facelifts to look like a guy with numerous facelifts. But Howard loves her, and they all had a fun time at the bi-bi phony wedding of Aniston and Theroux out in Hollywood a few months ago, the bogus wedding with Jimmy Kimmel playing the Catholic Priest part and fucking all the boys at the party...oops, only joking folks. The Anistons have been married for quite some time, as this blogger has reported in the past. Big deal, so what, two aged fugs scrambling for publicity with Howard Stern as their paid stooge idiot reporting on the big wedding, wow. 

So where will Howard end up next year? On television? Oh, he wants the prime time Fall season, not some shitty summer filler show. Too hilarious about all his phantom TV offers he likes to not talk about on his radio show since it could result in his ass being exposed as a flabby liar, but hey, he and that she-man he hired Turk The Jerk have been trying to get another sucker to buy Howard TV so we have to wait and see what happens with that. The snail-paced live commercials is all Howard's show is anyway, who wants to see a visual of that? Oh, but we need a visual of the plastic surgery updates of all Howard's aged hagathas he calls friends like Julie Chen Miss Stone Statue reading from a teleprompter on her loser daytime talk show with the fossilized Sharon Osbourne who had to take a facelift break from the boring talk fest as they parade through Stern's studio so Howard can get some payola promo content while all his guests have to be fossils to make Beth O'Nobody look young. 

What about your cow rescue Bethie? They don't count since you stuff your sausage body into their skins and have them stamped with designer logos while gluing dyed horse tails on your head and claiming it's your real hair.

Marci Turkey is great at her job, can't slam her for that, she has those press releases all written and ready to go the second the Stern show ends for the day since Howard [of course] reads questions from his script and then it's ready to be distributed to all the standard online media outlets with the aged celebs' responses plugged in by Turks Army. Wow, Stern is constantly in the press with the recap of his fossilized celeb interviews right there for anyone to read across the Internet. Well, it keeps him from searching for that bottle of pills before finding the nearest window to jump out of in his private apartment with his long time companion Ralphie grabbing at his platform shoes begging him to not jump.

What happened to Bethie? No Howard TV no Beth. Will she make her usual aged hagatha appearance on Howard's audio-only radio show to plug her latest round of shitty products and ignore the fact she is building an invisible kitten center at NSAL? She has been looking particularly horrible lately as shown on her Instagram selfie site plugging herself endlessly as a sit-at-home do-nothing charity worker.

Bag and Sag Bethie looking all of her 46 years as she forgets sometimes to photoshop her selfies:

We see that since Sam Smith ignored the old fart Howard Stern who called him fat in the press [fat jokes are PC, right Howard? Just not the gay jokes], Sam's star is rising all by itself without the need of Howard and his harassment in a pathetic bid at getting Howard's name in print. Sam is recording the theme to the new Bond movie "Spectre". Jealous much, Howard? Will Sam go slumming and do your pathetic radio show? Eat your heart out Howard, all you are getting so far to parade into your studio are menopausal hagathas fighting old man time and losing.