Slow News

4-21-15, slow adult Beth was hogging
 a red carpet at another D List Cinema
 Society screening of the film
 "Adult Beginners" held far away from where
 the real action is at the Tribeca Film Festival, 
which is still going strong.

Miss Football head forgot her helmet for her slow adult walk hogging a red carpet for a rare evening out, apparently alone, with no chaperone to keep her from attacking all the men at the event where it seems that Princess Pariah could not horn in on the after party, only for the movie screening. No photos yet that anyone was there to keep her at least 30 yards away from Andrew Saffir, co-founder of The Cinema Society, and seemed to skip the event probably to avoid Beth Stern.

General view of the Beth-free after party for "Adult Beginners" where stars like Bobby Cannavale, Nick Kroll, and Daman Wayans Jr., were in attendance   

2013, La Palestra charity benefit in the Hamptons.
Beth harasses the gay boys in the Hamptons. Keep
your mouth to yourself Beth.

Beth can never keep her hands off the boys as she was attacking Andrew Saffir's longtime partner Daniel Benedict at a Hamptons event in 2013 to benefit Howard's irritating personal trainer and fame whore wannabe and former Kennedy clan hanger-on Pat Manocchia, who started a tax shelter charity called La Palestra. Yes, Howard was there, so Saffir and Benedict could do little to stop Beth from her advances.

Arnold Schwarzeneggar was at the Tribeca Film Festival on 4/22/15 attending the screening of "Maggie" with Bobby DeNiro. So Big Head Arnold skipped the Stern satellite radio show on Wednesday? Or was that already pre-taped and will air sometime next week? Howard likes to pretend his interviews are recorded live but he tapes a lot in one day because he is running and hiding from Simon Cowell who pretends to want Stern's job on "America's Got Talent" just to throw a scare into the fruity talk radio show's frizzy weave and laugh behind his scared chicken shit back. You see, Howard needs the job, Simon doesn't. That's what's so funny, aside from Howard moving out of his Hamptons home and leaving it to Slow Adult Beth as a kitten prison camp. Beth does a drive-by in her limo throwing cats at families that don't want them. But good luck returning them to Stalag Beth. Beth deletes your photos off Instagram and burns an effigy of the disobedient foster families and does a naked dance at midnight hoping the disobedient foster homes burn in hell.

Goddamn Beth, how much cosmetic work did you get done in Los Angeles? Or did you really go? Me-thinks you jetted off to your Florida surgery center and got 50 injections in your face of lethal Botox and other fillers along with giant liposuction since you are wearing huge fat pants to hide your alleged fat lipo bandages.

Yes, Princess Short Fat Legs paraded on the red carpet for a Cinema Society movie screening without Howard Stern, a giant no-no, unless Stern can get a chaperone for her. Cute, Beth, holding up a purse that says "Stern" is so funny and proves a "Stern" showed up with you right? 

Notice Beth's babysitter Jill Martin has the same purse as Beth

when they attended a Cinema Society screening of  "Serena"

on March 21, 2015. They must have had a huge sale on those plastic

purses and Jill got a few for free seeing as how she is a big time

fashion correspondent for "Good Morning America" and wrote a book

"Fashion For Dummies" for people who want to look a dummy 

that pieced together leftover designer shit at the end-of-season half price sale.

4/21/15, Los Angeles, Le Bean & Le Bomb
attend HBO's premiere of the
documentary about Kurt Cobain, which
was originally screened at the
Sundance Film Festival.

Speaking of slow news, Courtney Love and her daughter Frances Bean Cocaine attended a screening of the documentary about Kurt Cobain with Frances as executive producer. Pretty funny since mommy turned down two major roles for her daughter, the Twilight movie franchise and Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, wonder why? Frances has a severe learning disability covered up by her mom who has a face disability and suffers from plastic surgery addiction aside from past addictions that she says she is free of but not soon enough. I guess it doesn't matter what with Frances inheriting about a third of her father's estate she is worth about a 100 million or something, who's counting, but she reportedly has developmental problems which is no shock since her mother was an addict as publicly reported. 

Frances does artwork in charcoal under the pseudonym Fiddle Tim. 
She looks crazy like her dad and we hope mom gets rid of any guns
lying around the house while Fiddle Tim is out to lunch. 

Frances used to look like a Bloated Bean. Can she stop
the crazy eyes for a second? I think she practices keeping
them until control now that she looks sedated
in more recent, skinny photos.

Did Howard Stern question Rumer Willis
about her mom paying for sex with young men
and dated Vito Schnabel, Heidi Klum's
current boy toy? How scientologists
set her up with Ashton to revive
her dead career? No? No wonder Stern's
show is so deathly boring.

Last but never least in the world of slow news, Howard Stern interviewed Rumer Willis on Wednesday's satellite radio show. Oh, poor Rumer, a gender nonspecific product of a boarding school and was sent home to Idaho for the summer to spend time with Miss Kabbal Scientologist mommy Demi in her home filled with dolls with different groups of dolls on alternating evenings placed in a circle of support having major life discussions with them.

I hope Miss Willis doesn't want Howard Stern's judging job on "America's Got Talent" or Howard will go into another medicated scripted speech and rant for two hours about how he doesn't need the second job, but that he would never try and steal a job from behind anyone's back [just don't call David Letterman to verify that].