Slave to the Satellite

Poor Howard Stern, he just can't seem to ditch the satellite job and the steady income from being a talk radio DJ for 30 years, when Oprah Winfrey finally quit SiriusXM radio since going full Hollywood, garnering a few Oscars for becoming a producer on several film projects. 

We remember Oprah was with the original XM satellite radio for many years, the company that rejected Howard Stern and told him to watch the door from hitting him in the ass on his way out, laughing at his offer to grace them with his presence on their satellite. 

Oh yes, the merger, when the newly formed company was at death's door, being saved by Monster Malone since the Howard Stern hiring debacle. The power of Howard Stern, Mr. Irrelevant and Mothballed, gee whiz, he finally found his place in the grand scheme of talentless dolts who talk for a living and refuse to retire even though he is in advanced old age living under a wig.

Mel Karmazin was fired from the company, yet no one fires Howard Stern unless they are ready to do battle in the press with the egomaniacal wigged fidget.

Siriusly Stern was set up and it never could pay the bills, having to acquire the sports channels aside from all the paid publicity limited run channels for aged celebs like Billy Joel. Poor Howard also couldn't pay the bills with his satellite salary, what with the massive divorce settlement to wife #1 and now the bearded lady he hired who never could procure an income, vertically, that is. 

Beth's new round of photo
props as posted on her
Instagram 4/13/15.

So now Bethie is off to the races again waiting to snatch more kittens before they are adopted by real families, not selfie families, like Beth with her selfie imagination that she is famous and we all can't wait to see her fresh botoxed face rolling around on the floor with some newly acquired photo props before they are dumped onto foster families in New Jersey.

How many more wigs and facelifts
will Howard get before
he is fired by NBC for bringing nothing
to "America's Got Talent"
except low ratings?

Pretty funny on Monday's state satellite radio show Howard danced around what he really did in Los Angeles over the vacation break, it was called, what? Working his second job. The stooge has no cash, he is constantly working for wages while getting free trips to the West Coast where he stated he visited with his daughter; oh lucky girl! Daddy won't spend a dime out of his own pocket to visit you, honey, it has to be a paid trip by his second employer, NBC.

Howard was desperate to name drop while in LA, when all we heard was that he sat around with his old, and I mean old, girlfriend Mary McCormack, and without her hubby? Is he still a scientologist fucking the lazy eyed Katharine McPhee? No? Howard said he chatted up Courteney Cox who hired her fugly boyfriend for "Cougar Town", you know, Beth's old friend, Brian Van Escort, wow, the D List rarely vertical circles Howard is in, just amazing.

I never heard any job offers Howard or Beth got while out in Hollywood, nope, two ignored pariahs sent back to their NY nesting places figuring out how to keep the public funding their income, what with that subscription based satellite service and Beth harassing the public for money to fund her existence at the North Shore Animal League. We just can't wait for the Apple the Cat Fund, Beth is chomping at her bit waiting for that round of publicity when the cat completes that last run up the cat tree of life.

Oh, but on Monday's radio show we heard how Howard is so happy with Beth! He can't believe how happy he is with Bethie while hoping that her tons of Botox side effects lead to a garage filled with yellow packing cord.