Will Beth stop irritating everyone in 2016?

Not bloody likely. Anyone who has done their own Google searches for Beth Stern have seen the thousands of photos of the massive football headed wife of Howard Stern and can see all the various stages of photoshopping by Howard Stern and his paid photogs that are required to follow around the prize nobody so she can satisfy her selfie obsession pretending she is a famous model when she was just a famous leftover from that famous group of gals called the Barflies with their asses stuck to a Nobu leatherette barstool waiting for a bunch of aged pseudo celebs to walk through the doors who are shopping for something in a bleached blonde beard and wig.

Oh, how far we've come, Bethie, from those lonely days in the Pitts when you couldn't drive a car yet all your friends had cars, right? What scared you, honey? Not all those dead bodies you "found" that led to that brain blockage, where you callously told your little Instagram followers two weeks after you found your feral cat's dead body; the cat you named after his deformity, which is what you do, Beth, like Blind Buddy or Charlie Chunk, there was Wonky the Feral Cat when you didn't even bother to stop when that Mustang slammed into its body, right? Is this correct? Oh, you can't talk about it, scared to drive, scared to drive. No funeral for your friend Wonky the Cat? No urn in the bedroom, no foundation, no nothing. That is Beth, filled with nothing, no emotion except what she can conjure up after spending a few hypnotic sessions with her therapist and D List acting coach.

Beth never bothered to tell her Instagram cat club followers about the death of her feral cat until two weeks after the event. Oh, just found the body, great honey, while you were on your loser Yoda the Cat book tour with one book signing since it's such a loser bomb debacle of trees you murdered to publish it in the guise of charity work. Just stop with the useless paper products Bethie, donate your own cash to the North Shore Animal League to build your little alleged cat adoption center featuring your selfie foundation's name on it to honor your dead dog, Bianca. Wonky the feral cat doesn't warrant any memorial, right?

Let's go back down memory lane as we close out 2015 and think about that article Beth did for the magazine called FHM in 2002. In the article Beth said she was a serial dater in school [she later confirmed this on the Howard Stern stale satellite radio show and said she cheated on all her boyfriends]. She never dated just one guy without having another one on the side, and so forth. I guess she bedded every guy from 2nd grade until she was thrown out of college. How amazing Beth's trashy little world was living in that townhouse when the Big Apple was calling with Beth chomping at her bit to take a bite which finally led to the back door of a quaint little bar off Broadway that led to the world of David Letterman, right, the guy that got away yet allegedly, according to reports from various sources like Crazy Days and Nights dot net, that good ol' Dave loved the local whorehouse close to his studio where he would spend many hours after taping his show, how fun that he met Beth, right? Is that the story? Gosh, I just don't know anymore there are just so many vague stories swirling around about Beth, who knows what the truth is. I wonder if Beth will ever tell the truth or just continue to bug the hell out of everyone. 

As we head into another year, dear readers, Beth continues to spin out of control on her Instagram site and in stupid scripted interviews where she is an ignored pariah and her pathetic followers have no idea who she is other than a crazy selfie monster with no life. Beth has stated publicly that she runs to Howard Stern constantly telling him about all the people she "blocks" on her social media sites, well good for you honey bunny, you are a precious little pudgette with the fantasy you are a tall skinny model when you are dumpy menopausal woman who thinks she's famous. Keep up that bloat face in Florida, oh it looks good on you; you look just like Joan Rivers, may she rest in peace.

Meanwhile, the real model Heidi Klum is having a fun time in Switzerland this week with her billionaire boy toy as rumors abound their relationship has cooled off, well, who knows, since it was reported Ms. Klum has signed all the docs back in August and is ready, set and go with the all clear to marry her boyfriend who is sought after by many stars and starlets. I guess we have to watch what happens.

And what about this Bill Cosby case? Since 2009 various sources have alleged Mr. Cosby is HIV positive and likes the pot smoke, Howard likes that too, right? Well, judging by Cosby's latest alleged sexual abuse victim who looks more butch than Beth, I think it might be a reality. I hope Howard doesn't salivate too much over this photo, as this is Howard's type of guy, I mean gal, I mean, hmmmm.

Keep it up Beth, we can't wait for your transformation from Joan Rivers into Janice Dickinson. Keep up the Botox work crews on that face, Beth, you will look like this plastic surgery freak in about 8 months except Beth cries over kitties and not passing out and being attacked by Mr. Fem's non existent private part while pretending to live with Beth and posing for headless selfies while having to enlist his alleged followers of dubious sexual orientation to defend Beth on her InstaTwit sites in case anyone is mean to the menopausal baby Beth.

Beth will certainly be a sight to behold when Howard's satellite radio contract finally expires, but will he expire or will satellite expire first? Howard ain't ever quitting, he will be the oldest shock jock in history thinking it's sexy to talk about pleasuring himself to faux pedo porn on the Internet while his aged pariah sits in the Hamptons wondering where her next purebred cat will come from that she can pretend was homeless and she can foster it to death.

Have a safe and happy New Year's celebration, Beth Fans. I hope to keep you entertained for many months to come. Stay tuned, and remember, it's more fun to roast the stupid than to be stupid...what'd I say?