The Best Kitten Snatch & Dump Hat?

Beth O'Stern has a hard time deciding on exactly the right hat to wear to dump those phony foster kittens onto a bunch of morons who think Beth O'ScamO is actually doing charity work by housing a few kittens at her various homes and scheduling dumping sessions in record time. Yes, that is the gimmick thought up by Howard's team of lawyers to keep Beth somehow in the public eye and have something to post on those FREE [the key word] Instagram and Twitter sites since Howard is paying about 0.0 to establish and maintain a personal website for Beth. She did have a website that has long ago been abandoned because she tried selling her solo aged bikini photos to the public, you see how that went, she now has to stick animals in her photos or she is ignored by everyone. But she keeps her own dead website online in case someone wants to pay her a million dollars for the domain and use of her name [as if].

I don't know, a Great Gatsby hat? This is Beth's go-to hat for her Florida snatch and dump sessions. The photo below was posted on Beth's useless Instagram site on 11/24/15, supposedly working out of her Florida Fortress where she can't afford to live, but houses a few cats for 10 days as a tax write off trip before dumping them onto the local beasties or dragging them back to Stalag Beth/Hamptons the HQ of Frau Beth. At least Vampira can have a nice snack before she goes out for the evening to score some bigger game.

Beth, several months ago with Old Lady Lois Pope in Florida wearing that same straw hat all excited for doing nothing but waiting for the arrival of cats from other states while both she and Beth ignore all the animals languishing at local municipal animal shelters scheduled to die. I guess Florida animals are not good enough for Pope & the Dope.

As has been evident for years now, Beth needs the right hat for her staged photo sessions with animals and her kitten dumping sessions that she documents and attaches to her tax returns to prove she is a tireless selfie worker. She actually has the nerve to set up a few rooms in each of her posh properties to stuff kittens into as a tax write-off, which again begs the question, where is Howard and Beth's money? Tied up in a hush fund and three Trust Funds, right? Obviously, that is the only conclusion anyone can come to when they pull these phony animal activism stunts instead of just financing a kitten shelter themselves, or permanently keeping the cats Beth is snatching from dubious and suspicious sources. Real moguls do not set up photography selfie studios that are simply snatch and dump way stations for homeless cats. Genuine moguls donate their own cash to build an animal shelter and not badger the public for donations ad nauseam on their satellite radio show and on media sites.

Hey, need a grieving outfit for the dog you just overfed and incinerated? Beth can help, as she wore a bright outfit accessorized with her giant animal slaughter industry byproducts and stuffed a hat on her head to hide her plastic surgery from the sun with enormous dark glasses to hide her eye lift while they served as phony props to pretend she was grieving the loss of her dog, Bianca. Beth got sick of that same ol' bulldog in every photo and needed a fresh gimmick with ever-changing photo props to keep her brain dead Instagram followers entertained.

Howard Stern is working hard to make Beth famous when she is an aged pariah that everyone is desperate to avoid and trying to avoid getting stuck in her selfie vortex of nothing. Beth's face is pushed onto the internet and onto endless boring morning TV shows to make her a selfie star, she is not much else, but brags about all the animal slaughter industry byproducts that are crowded into her closets and she stuffs her body into or carries around with metal snaps and buckles with designer logos stamped on their hides.

Howard wears hats too, but it's only hair plug hats when he is growing a fresh crop of curly noodles on his head. They have to be hidden because they are obviously sewn into his head and there is a danger they might fall off his head or blow away until they take root. He wears a huge plastic shower cap on his head when he takes a shower but he really prefers California Baby Bubble Bath Aromatherapy so there is no hair plug danger. Remember when Beth did those embarrassing "Dry Divas" shower cap ads in 2013, before this kitten snatch & dump gimmick took root? It was so Howard could get his shower caps for free.

Here's a couple of hats you haven't worn yet Beth, and feel free to go ahead and take my ideas, I won't sue, I'm not in need of any money. I don't need to sue my employers or movie producers like your fearless leader Howard Stern has to do constantly to earn some extra dough while he is still stuck on a radio dial for 30 years and counting while you're stuck in a vortex of smelling kitten butts all day and sitting in a tepid pool of your own dirty bath water contemplating whether to take the blue pill or the red pill.



I hope Beth has a happy holiday thinking up more ways to score dough out of the public while pretending to be working on building a kitten adoption center at the bogus D List celebrity and corporate sponsored charity that pays her a salary, the North Shore Animal League. I am sure we will get yet another stale photo of her posing in front of that same ol' tired Christmas tree with the fugly decorations. No more Bianca the Bulldog posing with her since she got sick of it and moved onto a steady stream of fresh photo props to delight her fans on Long Island where the fairies don't need a boat to get there, they can fly there all on their own.

Beth fans are speaking out and they have asked that I post a photo of one of their members holding up an awesome flag they made in Beth's honor. Of course I said yes. I am not afraid of Beth's supporters, it's their bad jokes and stale guesses of who DBM really is that frightens me.